Who Knew Domestic Violence Could be So Funny?

Your mother raised you well Setanta Wink

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Naw, it was my grandparents . . . and, believe it or not, i dreamed that up on my own . . .

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watchmakers guidedog wrote:

edgarblythe wrote:
These women are more often than not incapable of firing the gun.

Finger on trigger.
Squeeze.

Yes, they've been psychologically abused and to some degree brain-washed. However they've got to face the truth that if they want to get out of their situation they might just have to do some difficult things to achieve it.

I would love for the world to somehow step in and save them from the consequences of their actions, but I know it's not likely to.

Huh? You get to just shoot your abuser in the US?

Here, you would be likely convicted of murder - unless he had had a gun trained on you.

(Not that we have guns, generally, thank god)

(Although juries can do what they wish, as in Goodfileder's axe incident. But, if it is the same case, everyone, including the defence lawyer, were flabbergasted by the verdict - though it may be a different case. In the one I am thinking of, she killed him while he slept.)

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Yep! Shoot at will.

In Florida it doesn't even have to be an abuser, just someone you percieve as a threat.

We don't mess around... 'cept with our wimen folk.

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Good grief!!!

Not that I do not, in my job, fantasise about setting up death squads for some of these guys - but that is fantasy!

It's another planet in your country.

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A man should not lay a hand on a woman.

Unless of course she interupts him while NASCAR or football is on television.

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Ticomaya wrote:

A man should not lay a hand on a woman.

Unless of course she interupts him while NASCAR or football is on.

Dats funny!

Setanta ... you are a sweetheart. And you never stop proving that fact. :wink:

dlowan ...... There are alot of women in prison for killing their abuser. There's no law here that says we are alowed to do that and get away with it. As a matter of fact, if I would have shot my abuser that day I wanted to...I would have been arrested and incarcerated. From that point it would be up to my lawyer to prove self defense on my part. That's why the shot would need to be at relatively close range.

There is also the defense of Battered Womens Syndrome.

So it's not exactly a cut and dry case. If you are a victim of abuse, and shoot your attacker.....you best have a good lawyer. And you best have documented evidence of the abuse. Another good reason for women to SPEAK UP and NOT BE SILENT. It truely is in the victims best interest to report these things.

I had a police officer give me some pointers. He told me to only shoot my abuser if he enters my home and endangers my life. To shoot to kill not to wound. And to use a hand gun powerful enough that he won't get back up after the first shot.

So, yes....a person might get away with killing the abuser - but the road traveled will be long and hard.

I think in California, they are recognizing the battered syndrome and letting lawyers go back and fight for women that have been in prison for years without a fair trial. One that truely looks at the emotional state of the victim and her need, and her right, to defend her own life.

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Yes, this business that the woman can shoot her abuser is not the case. The threat, I believe, must be immediate.

Of course, every jury is different, so I am sure that some do walk away from it. But on the whole, if she shoots him she will probably go to jail

Moreover, you don't hear too much about "temporary insanity" anymore, so that is one area that no longer appears to be open for such a case.

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Well, that is good to hear - much as a lot of these guys merit, (in my wishes), a post-natal abortion, - justifying killing people ought to be a very, very difficult thing to do.

The kind of easy justification folk appeared to be limning earlier would be a pretty terrible state of affairs, I think.

Of course, so ought bashing the crap out of people, or emotionally abusing them, too be very difficult - well, actually impossible, to justify.

Sigh.

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Quote:

He told me to only shoot my abuser if he enters my home and endangers my life. To shoot to kill not to wound. And to use a hand gun powerful enough that he won't get back up after the first shot.

Abusive man, entering battered women's shelter, engaging in violence...

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watchmakers guidedog wrote:

Abusive man, entering battered women's shelter, engaging in violence...

And they do get in sometimes....and it does happen. I won't go into specifics with you for obvious reasons - but local victims are not always placed in a local shelter. And if they are - it is temporary and they are hidden in various places. The victim is given strict instructions to not give out this address to anyone. From there - they are moved to a different shelter and out of the temporary shelter arrangements. This shelter is generally a distance away from the abuser.

Sometimes there is a "fast" shuffling of temporary arrangements. Depending on how violent and how serious the situation is. The victim might be moved around several times over the course of a few days - to confuse the abuser if it is high profile and extremely dangerous. Just IN CASE he is a good stalker.

Sometimes the victim will carry a cell phone. It is best to remove the cell phone from their possession so there are no "mistakes." The victim can put everyone around them in danger if they talk to their abuser. I had a victim do this to me once.

Mistakes do happen. Things do go wrong sometimes. But if the main shelter house is entered by an abuser seeking his victim ( most abusers know where the main shelter house is in their area) - the workers are very well trained in what to do. These places are on lock down for the most part and in order to enter a shelter you will have to have clearance.

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We need to be a bit specific about the legal issues involved where the abused person fights back. It really depends on your jurisdiction as to how it plays out in court. As we've seen the law regarding self defence in Florida is different from that in most common law jurisdictions. It's very probable that the defence available to the abused person will in fact be self defence. One of the requirements of self defence is "immediacy". The case I referred to - and dlowan knows it - saw the defendant convicted initially because she axed him while he was sleeping. There was no immediate threat (although she had been beaten before he went to sleep). The jury found for murder as it was bound to under the law as it stood. On the retrial the defence was constructed to go to the mental element and to try for a diminished responsibility approach. The basis of it was the "battered woman syndrome". I think the wording of that has changed now.

If anyone's interested the work of Dr Patricia Easteal is informative. Perhaps it should be required reading for the SC legislature.

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goodfielder wrote:

The basis of it was the "battered woman syndrome". I think the wording of that has changed now.

Yes. Battering and it's effects is the wording of preference now. Very good post, goodfielder.

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justa_babbling_brooke wrote:

And they do get in sometimes....and it does happen.

I believe you. I'm just saying that it seems to be a situation which justifies the use of violence/firearms to an equal degree to an abusive man entering the ex-partner's home.

Quote:

I won't go into specifics with you for obvious reasons

If it's not a rude question you seem extremely knowledgable. Do you work in the social-work field?

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Ticomaya wrote:

A man should not lay a hand on a woman.

Unless of course she interupts him while NASCAR or football is on television.

I agree...unless she is beating the living hell out of him. Reverse abuse does happen.

My brother used to get scratched and punched by this girl when he was in about 3rd grade. My parents taught him never ever hit a girl. So she continued to beat up on my little brother. They called the school and reported her, asked that she not be put in the same class as him and guess what happened? They put her in the same class the next year. It continued for a while. Finally, my mom told him to hit her back! And when he did, he got in trouble. Rolling Eyes

Such bulls*it.

I always believed that you never hit a woman unless you are defending yourself. If I was wailing on my husband with a frying pan, I would expect him to fight back. Not just stand there and take it.

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watchmakers guidedog wrote:

If it's not a rude question you seem extremely knowledgable. Do you work in the social-work field?

You need to go back and read JBB's contributions to the thread again, WMG, and you should, eventually one hopes, understand the authority with which she speaks.

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watchmakers guidedog wrote:

I believe you. I'm just saying that it seems to be a situation which justifies the use of violence/firearms to an equal degree to an abusive man entering the ex-partner's home.

I agree with you. However, the law is touchy in so many ways.

Quote:

If it's not a rude question you seem extremely knowledgable. Do you work in the social-work field?

Not rude at all. Smile

I guess life has a way of giving us "knowledge" about things we don't always wish to know about. These are things that we learn by living them. As far as doing social work - I have no degree in this line of work. But I am an advocate for a domestic violence shelter and I volunteer my time in whatever way they need me to. So besides my background in my own (past) abusive relationship - I am around other women that are trying to get out of theirs.

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justa_babbling_brooke wrote:

I agree with you. However, the law is touchy in so many ways.

Don't need to say that twice.

Quote:

But I am an advocate for a domestic violence shelter and I volunteer my time in whatever way they need me to.

They're lucky to have you Very Happy

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watchmakers guidedog wrote:

They're lucky to have you

I thank you much, watchmaker. Embarrassed

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justa_babbling_brooke wrote:

The SC legislators are pure scum-bags.

Would I shoot him if I had to? If it's going to be either him or me - yes, I would. And my gut tells me that someday, I will probably find out.

OMG! Is he such a goddamn bastard. I understand you haven't seen him for a while. Do you think he'll come back for some sort of revenge? If so, he should get to a mental institution asap.

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Who Knew Domestic Violence Could be So Funny?

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