Is she into me or what?!

Reply Fri 18 Jan, 2019 08:19 am
Hey all, I need some insight. I'll give some background and I hope this doesn't get too long lol

I'm a 30 year old bisexual woman who has just left a very abusive marriage to a man. I'm not really looking for a relationship, especially with a man, any time soon. BUT I am catching vibes from a very unlikely source and its left me a bit confused and wondering if I'm just reading into it because I'm "lonely" or if there is actually something there.

My ex husbands aunt had always been in my life since my husband was. She is one of the sweetest and kindest people I've ever met. Would honestly give you the shirt off her back. And idk...I've always had a tiny crush on her here and there and she's super affectionate. She is not married...was a long time ago but she's been single for many years. She's 49. She says she likes being alone. She's pretty religious and is a born again Christian and has her "views" on homosexuality but sometimes I almost feel like she's hiding something behind that.

Ive been separated from my ex for about 6 months now and she has been with me every step of the way. She witnessed some of the abuse and has helped me tremendously emotionally and with my 3 kids. She's gone above and beyond for me.
Now all of that alone wouldn't be enough for me to think anything but I'm highly intuitive and some of the things she says and does makes me feel like she's flirting with me. She is so beautiful and I can definitely say I'm attracted to her but I would NEVER put our relationship at stake in order to reveal these emotions to her. I just need someone to tell me I'm not crazy for thinking this.

So some of the things that make me think she feels this way:

- she talks to me ALL day through text. Basically for the last 6 months we talk morning until night, sometimes on the phone for hours and sometimes just through text but there's always an open line of communication.

-if I ask for a favor she jumps at the opportunity pretty much every time...even if you can tell it kind of puts her out of her way.

- she's affectionate already but I have felt an increase as of lately. When she says goodbye to people she kisses them on the cheek and hugs them but sometimes our kisses goodbye some closer to being kisses on the lips. It actually happened on accident once and she was soooo awkward about it.

- she shows off her body to me. Idk if she thinks I'm not noticing but I'm pretty sure she does. She has a nice butt and she will bend over in front of me often; or once she was like bending over and her thong was totally showing, she knew it...I knew it...but she did nothing to fix it. This happens OFTEN.

- she will do flirtatious things like tell me to smell her shoulder or neck because she used a new soap.

- her texts are always flirty. Lots of kiss emojis and hearts. Constantly.

-I can sense her nervousness sometimes and her need to impress me for some reason

-she compliments me often. In all sorts of different ways.

- sometimes we go do things with my kids but sometimes it feels like she's going for a "date" vibe. We spent the entire fall going to different cider mills every weekend.

-when she sees me she always seems genuinely happy to see me. Especially if it's been a couple days. I feel like we both always make up little excuses to see each other. Even if it's just for a minute

-when she's over she's comfortable, she will cook for me and my kids and make comments about her and I being a good team.

-her hugs will last extra long or she will rub my arm afterwards.

-she is constantly telling me that I don't need to be in a relationship right now...like she's worried she will lose my time...

- I almost feel like she's enjoying teasing me lol

Am I being crazy?! Am I reading into her being a nice person? Does she just like the attention?! Ugh!!! I can't say anything because I don't want to screw up our relationship but I just have to know what others might think about this. It's a weird situation.

Is there something I can do subtly that might help verify this...
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Reply Sat 19 Jan, 2019 11:04 am

Hmm, I admit it's hard to say, but personally I'm not sure she can love you in a romantic way. Maybe she sees you as a very good friend and that's why she's acting in a way that can be confusing. It can happen in female friendships. It even seems to be a high friendship goal to seem gay to each other haha ^^

Moreover, if I understood your message, this person is rather against what relates to homosexuality. Even if you think she could hide something, nothing proves the opposite for the moment. However, nothing prevents you from trying to approach the issue with her, but not directly at first. For example, say that there was little you saw a friend of yours who was lesbian, or something like that, and try to start a discussion from there to have her opinion.

And does she know that you are bisexual? Because in itself, if she knows it, that you are free and that she is interested and free, it is possible that she tries something. But I confess that just like that, I can't say much more. Maybe you can also try to ask to her friends or relatives if it's possible that she flirts with you, if she does that with others, etc. And if it is not possible between you (but I hope for you that it will be), stay with friends, and meet other pretty women ^^

Oh, and congratulations to you for getting out of this abusive marriage, you probably had to be very brave to get out of it. I wish you a lot of happiness after that :-)

Well, I hope that what I wrote will help you in one way or another.

Good luck!

Reply Sat 19 Jan, 2019 11:30 am
Sorry, I wanted to say : "stay friends with her, and meet other pretty women ^^". I don't know why, I can't edit it.
Reply Mon 21 Jan, 2019 06:04 am
You can only edit/delete for about 5-10 minutes after posting. After that it's set in stone.
Reply Mon 21 Jan, 2019 09:10 am
Ah ok, I didn't know that. Thank you!
Reply Mon 21 Jan, 2019 10:01 am
It catches most people out when they first get here.
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