10
   

He forgot my birthday.

 
 
Reply Thu 6 Dec, 2018 10:18 am
So we've been dating for a year and a month. Started dating in Oct '17. Of course we exchanged basic details abt each other. So I mentioned my birthday was on 18th Dec. But he forgot... so he asked, "Babe, I know your birthday is in Dec, sorry, remind me the date, I forgot." Being under 2 months of dating, I let it slide... maybe he forgot for real. But, this year, he asked me the same question today. He still doesn't know my birthday, mind you, we celebrated his in July. Am I over reacting and being petty?
 
edgarblythe
 
  1  
Reply Thu 6 Dec, 2018 10:27 am
@Lorna0492,
There are lots of dates as important as that one and more that I never can remember. Not everybody has perfect recall.
0 Replies
 
ehBeth
 
  1  
Reply Thu 6 Dec, 2018 11:08 am
@Lorna0492,
I've been with my partner over 20 years. Until he joined FB, I argued with him about when his birthday was. I couldn't tell you when we met - year or date. He's better at that kind of thing than I am.

So, as a not-date rememberer, I don't think it's any kind of deal.

So many more important things in relationships and life than remembering the date of anything.
0 Replies
 
chai2
 
  1  
Reply Thu 6 Dec, 2018 11:15 am
Same here. It took me more than 17 years or more of marriage to get. It straight when my husbands birthday is. For the last 8 I only remember because I have to use it often to check his health records.

I am glad we married on a date of a major holiday , as it’s the only way I’d remember it.

I figure I’m older than 9 years old so there’s no need to make a big deal about my own birthday. I barely remember when it is, and have actually been reminded of it the day after.
ehBeth
 
  1  
Reply Thu 6 Dec, 2018 11:32 am
@chai2,
I have problems remembering my age. I have a couple of life-long friends whose birthdays are very close to mine. I tend to give myself another year as a gift whenever they have a birthday. One year I started as a 34 year old and was 37 by the end of the year. My mother corrected me as she didn't think she should have a 37 year old daughter Laughing
chai2
 
  1  
Reply Thu 6 Dec, 2018 01:10 pm
@ehBeth,
I know it's a big deal for many people re having others remember their birthday, and I never have gotten that.

It's not "your" day, or cause for anyone to make a fuss. You just happen to have been born on that date X number of years ago. That's all.

Years back, there was this young receptionist where I worked, and I'd say like a freaking month before the date she started going on about how her 19th birthday was coming up. I mean every opportunity she was saying something. So super annoying. It was like she expected a pony ride or something.

19? Please.
0 Replies
 
jespah
 
  2  
Reply Thu 6 Dec, 2018 01:36 pm
This is almost the plot of Sixteen Candles.
0 Replies
 
PUNKEY
 
  2  
Reply Thu 6 Dec, 2018 02:15 pm
@Lorna0492,
He remembered it was in Dec. but forgot the day.

Consider yourself lucky.
0 Replies
 
CalamityJane
 
  2  
Reply Thu 6 Dec, 2018 03:43 pm
I think it is important.....and therefore I know the birthdays of my loved ones and friends too. They're not Jane or John Doe to me, they're important and why would I forget their special day? It's exactly once a year and we all have cell phones and other tools we can choose as a reminder, why not do so?

Anyway, he at least has asked again and that's more than others would do. Tell him your birthday and ask him to add it in his cell phone calendar. This way he'll be reminded.
InuYasha3901
 
  -2  
Reply Thu 6 Dec, 2018 04:26 pm
@Lorna0492,
That is sad. Glad it wasn't me who forgot. 😅
0 Replies
 
chai2
 
  1  
Reply Thu 6 Dec, 2018 05:11 pm
@CalamityJane,
CalamityJane wrote:

I think it is important.....and therefore I know the birthdays of my loved ones and friends too. They're not Jane or John Doe to me, they're important and why would I forget their special day? It's exactly once a year and we all have cell phones and other tools we can choose as a reminder, why not do so?



Honestly, taking away all the media hype, consumerism and idea that it's what you're "supposed" to do, what the hell makes it their "special day"?

How do you know that the person you are sending these wishes to appreciates it?
Because they say thanks? Think again. They may just be trying to be polite.

Odds are if you didnt' send them any kind of message, would they even notice? Who keeps track of that sort of thing?

Personally, I get anxious around people that Always have to remember Everything. You know, the one that's in every office that always seem to know everyone elses dates like this. Who are they doing it for? I think themselves.

What are grown people supposed to do because it's "their special day" anyway?

Yeah, it's exactly once a year, so it's really not something one could be expected to remember. Put it in your cell phone? Great. Another boop or beep going off to tell you something vitally important....not.

ehBeth
 
  1  
Reply Thu 6 Dec, 2018 05:20 pm
@CalamityJane,
CalamityJane wrote:
They're not Jane or John Doe to me, they're important and why would I forget their special day?


people whose birthdays I forget aren't Jane or John Doe to me. They're important to me. Their birthdays? Not important and I have never understood why anyone cares about them. It's not like there is one day a year to let people know I care about them.

I prefer every day, in every way.
ehBeth
 
  1  
Reply Thu 6 Dec, 2018 05:22 pm
@chai2,
chai2 wrote:
Odds are if you didnt' send them any kind of message, would they even notice? Who keeps track of that sort of thing?


definitely not me

I know there are people who are very date-oriented. I just don't get it. If people can't cope with me not being date-focused I'm likely not a good friend for them to have. Me remembering a date or two is more important than me demonstrating my love, support and caring? Bug off.
0 Replies
 
edgarblythe
 
  1  
Reply Thu 6 Dec, 2018 05:24 pm
My kids' birthdays are extremely important to me. That doesn't fix my disrememberer. Some minds simply are not able to retain birthdays very well.
ehBeth
 
  1  
Reply Thu 6 Dec, 2018 05:26 pm
@edgarblythe,
Yeah, no. I'm just not a calendar type.

Now take me somewhere, spin me around and I'll be able to tell you which direction I'm facing. Good spatial orientation I have. The only way that helps with birthdays is that I don't get lost on my way to birthday/anniversary parties Laughing
0 Replies
 
chai2
 
  1  
Reply Thu 6 Dec, 2018 05:34 pm
@ehBeth,
ehBeth wrote:

It's not like there is one day a year to let people know I care about them.



^^ This..

https://media.giphy.com/media/121YQW1OQhqGLS/giphy.gif


0 Replies
 
roger
 
  2  
Reply Thu 6 Dec, 2018 05:37 pm
My ex's birthday is towards the end of October. I send the card somewhere around Halloween.
chai2
 
  1  
Reply Thu 6 Dec, 2018 05:45 pm
@roger,
The only 2 people of my immediate family whose birthdate I remember is my mothers, who's dead, and my younger sister.

I don't bother to wish either of them happy birthday.

I don't know the dates of the deaths of my parents or brother, the birthdays of my other 2 siblings...one I'm pretty sure is in June, the other? No clue.

0 Replies
 
tsarstepan
 
  2  
Reply Thu 6 Dec, 2018 07:15 pm
@Lorna0492,
Lorna0492 wrote:

Am I over reacting and being petty?

Petty? Yes. Overthinking it? Yes.

Take his phone and put your birthday into his contact info for your number and also add it to his phone's calendar. Problem solved.

0 Replies
 
laughoutlood
 
  1  
Reply Thu 6 Dec, 2018 08:39 pm
@Lorna0492,
Better remind him about the Tuesday after too.

Though my heart can't believe that you forgot me
I keep telling myself I'm okay
I can get over anything but don't you see
It's forbidden to miss my birthday

0 Replies
 
 

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