Mon 3 Dec, 2018 02:04 am
My friend at work is a dude, and he recently went through a divorce. He has stopped hanging out with most of his old friends because they were all couple friends. I am married as well, but have shared with him that I am closeted. He has never treated me differently and has been very supportive. Since he has become single, he has slept around with lots of women and has claimed this is his experimental phase. He and I have hung out a few times, and talked openly about my situation. He asks me tons of questions- about how I meet men, what I am into sexually, what’s my type. I have flirted with him, and casually told him that he is “end game”. He always laughs and makes simple comments like, “you may be able to get it one day”. But then sometimes when we talk about things- he goes out of his way to mention how gross he thinks somethings are- like hairy chests and rim jobs.
I would say we probably text about 7/8 times a week, rarely about work. Always just checking in on the other- he has become my best friend. And he is the only person (other than men I meet on apps) that knows about my situation.
This past week, I took a day off of work and spent it with someone i met on an app and I told my friend what I had done. He called me and wanted me to tell him every detail of the encounter. And I mean every detail. I tried to skip over some, but he insisted on hearing it all. He had to let me go abruptly, as he had been driving while we were talking, and had reached his destination.
Should I continue to allow him to drive this on his terms? Should I ask him if he is curious? Should I just continue to be patient and see what happens?
I really wouldn’t mind helping him explore this side but I don’t want to apply pressure and loose his friendship.
He sounds like kind of a creepy dude if you ask me. Asking for the details of your sexual encounters? FFS man, (a) this **** should be private and (b ) this is teetering on the edge of sexual harassment - yes, even if he asked for the information - if not already in the abyss, and (c ) gossip is nasty passive-aggressive garbage that adults should not be engaging in.
Oh, and (d) you should be working when you're at work.
I guess you skipped over the parts about us talking outside of work. We NEVER have these conversations at work. Always on the phone after hours.
Regardless of where you 2 are for conversations, it sounds decidedly uncomfortable.
If he has been leading a heterosexual lifestyle, never did anything with another male, never had any inclination to do so, then he would not really be aroused by you.
Not sure which of you is creepier. You for telling him all the details and constantly telling him he is "end game" or him for pressing for so much info. A touch of curiosity is fine, he has gone past that (with your blessings).
He’s cuckholding you. If you don’t mind entertaining him, then continue to share your stories.
If you start to feel used and don’t think this is going to lead to anything you want, then end this part of the relationship.
Really, since his divorce he sounds like he’s a kid in a candy shop, only he doesn’t know what jar to pick from. So he’s picking your mind about your jar and what every little detail tastes like, without buying anything.