@kindpiano,
I'm only answering the OP.
If you are stupid, but 'all' turns out well... you're not as stupid as you thought yourself to be.
You are seeking 'Meaning' in an 'ongoing' issue of your own.
Everything - Appears to be relative when within the 'bubble' of self-relativity.
Your mind WILL twist EVERYTHING born to YOUR directive - In YOUR direction.
Reveal YOUR interest in this man, to this man, and see what happens. Or don't, and live in regret.
Maybe his Mother taught him that playing with round objects will attract women, men, other, whatetever.
Maybe his Mother taught him that playing with round objects will repel women, men, other, whatetever.
Who knows?