How do I get closer when she doesn’t like to talk about deep topics with me?

Reply Sun 8 Jul, 2018 08:16 am
Okay so this girl always puts me down as her one of her favorite people out of her guy friends yet talks to the others much more deep level.

When I’ve tried to talk and go deep she doesn’t want to really talk about it, like she sort of brushes it over, but if she overhears me talking about something light (like opinions on other people and gossip) she’ll happily join in with it.

She also considers me a “close” friend even though I don’t personally and that’s probably due to her large social circle; her large social circle also makes it hard to speak to her sometimes. She also finds me very funny.

What should I do to get closer to this girl even if it is being as a friend or relationship?
Reply Sun 8 Jul, 2018 08:57 am
Like asking her out????

Just you and her. Get to know her personally before expecting “close” conversation. She doesn’t really know you on a one-to- one basis.

If she declines the date, move on to another gal.
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Reply Sun 8 Jul, 2018 04:39 pm
It's likely the way you are approaching it.

I'm guessing you are asking her questions, and she doesn't feel comfortable with them.

If you hear something you want to explore, try offering her a similar experience that you had, and how it made you feel. Then let her talk.

I think though, that perhaps you are overthinking things. If the deep topics are sad/bad, then there are many reasons for people not to discuss topics that are too deep with people they really like:
- they don't want to discuss sad topics with you
- they want the friendship/relationship to be about positives
- they want a person they can just be happy around
- etc
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