My hubby eats what I cook, or he get's something himself. Case closed. I am not a kitchen. I am not a short-order cook. I make dinner and if he is hungry, he eats it. If he doesn't want it, he finds something else.
I wouldn't worry so much. He is a grown man.
surfdude wrote:I am a man- an always hungry man. If he wont eat what you lovingly prepare for him. DON'T FEED HIM! He'll come around real quick! Promise.
If my wife stopped feeding me I would definatly pay attention to whatever she had to say!
Now that's what I call a great answer.
Welcome aboard A2K surfdude. I like you already :-D
I like him, too!
Nice Goddess attitude, Bella! I think the same way. Probably because my mother did, too. She figured it was her job to plan the menus & do the cooking, and our job to eat it. Plain and simple. My hubby grew up in a household where his mother ASKED everyone what they wanted and prepared meals to order. This was NOT going to happen at my house. So guess what? My hubby does most of the cooking now. Everyone's happy that way, and I eat whatever he feels like making. Or I fix something separately for myself.
surfdude, If my wife, suddenly, stopped cooking foods I was basically addicted to, I'd be ripped. If I didn't know how to make them myself, I'd go out to buy them, prepared. And when I got home, I'd still be angry. This situation seems, like almost any conflict in a marriage, to require diplomacy and reasoning and negotiation, rather than a black-and-white response. I agree with you that this guy needs to pay attention, but cutting off his chow might well stir up an unhelpful reaction.
Miklos7 wrote:surfdude, If my wife, suddenly, stopped cooking foods I was basically addicted to, I'd be ripped. If I didn't know how to make them myself, I'd go out to buy them, prepared. And when I got home, I'd still be angry. This situation seems, like almost any conflict in a marriage, to require diplomacy and reasoning and negotiation, rather than a black-and-white response. I agree with you that this guy needs to pay attention, but cutting off his chow might well stir up an unhelpful reaction.
being an ass and crying when she makes something other than mac and cheese doesn't sound like a very helpful reaction either.
Bella Dea, Did AirForce girl say that when she doesn't cook the "children's menu" for her husband, he turns into a crying ass? I don't think so--but he may sulk a bit! And, why wouldn't he sulk yet more if his Life List is no longer being served at all? If he's cut off, what's to keep him from going someplace where the menu is more to his liking? There seems to be an assumption that he will simply roll over when he gets hungry enough. We guys, most of us, can find what we need. If we're addicted to burgers, we're going to find them. Better for his wife to use her strong suit, negotiation, and keep him at her table. She sounds like a very nice person--which gives her an advantage.
Miklos7 wrote:Bella Dea, Did AirForce girl say that when she doesn't cook the "children's menu" for her husband, he turns into a crying ass? I don't think so--but he may sulk a bit! And, why wouldn't he sulk yet more if his Life List is no longer being served at all? If he's cut off, what's to keep him from going someplace where the menu is more to his liking? There seems to be an assumption that he will simply roll over when he gets hungry enough. We guys, most of us, can find what we need. If we're addicted to burgers, we're going to find them. Better for his wife to use her strong suit, negotiation, and keep him at her table. She sounds like a very nice person--which gives her an advantage.
Whatever....that's like saying if his wife isn't giving him enough sex he will find it elsewhere. So she should make adjustments to her libido so that she can ensure he stays in her bed....
Miklos7 wrote:surfdude, If my wife, suddenly, stopped cooking foods I was basically addicted to, I'd be ripped. If I didn't know how to make them myself, I'd go out to buy them, prepared. And when I got home, I'd still be angry. This situation seems, like almost any conflict in a marriage, to require diplomacy and reasoning and negotiation, rather than a black-and-white response. I agree with you that this guy needs to pay attention, but cutting off his chow might well stir up an unhelpful reaction.
Wow! Good thing you're not my husband! When I cook for someone, it's because I feel like cooking for them and I don't do menu orders. It must be nice to have a personal cook, free of charge! I hope you tip her well
The father of my son use to tell me that cooking and cleaning was a womans job and mark my words, he regretted saying this to me. I stopped cooking for him, cleaning up after him and washing is cloths and when I got sick of looking at his dirty dishes and the rest of his mess, I just threw his ungrateful ass out the door. I'm much happier now :-D
I still think his basic menu isn't that awful. Missing some fruits/veggies but it's a good basic menu.
If he likes grilled chicken, cook grilled chicken and then prepare other stuff on the side for yourself. Same thing with the burgers.
Cook up a dozen meals worth of his favourites when you're making it - freeze them in meal size packages - either of you can pull them out when you're cooking something he doesn't care for.
Changing someone's eating habits (especially when they're eating good basics) doesn't seem worth getting twisted up about. I can appreciate that it's boring, but there are certainly ways to vary the sides for yourself.
If he can't seem to manage thawing out packages of his favourites when you're making something else, I'd be a bit more concerned.
He likes what he likes. That's how most of us are.
ehBeth, Nice idea! I like the idea of the pre-prepared frozen meals--there could be some of HER favorites in the freezer, too.
I agree with you that changing someone's eating habits may not be worth "getting twisted up about," but it is a health issue.
I still don't understand why he doesn't cook for her half the time, since they both work.
Montana, Anyone who says that cooking and cleaning is a woman's job is not worth your time. My father taught me how to do basic cooking, cleaning, sewing, and ironing, so that I would not be helpless--and a burden on some poor woman. That was 50 years ago; I think he was ahead of his time.
My husband and I worked stuff out quite well for many years, but then finally didn't, and it wasn't about food.
I was older. I could already cook a meal to the foods of the day in the magazine section of the newspaper, but he had tried to cook once in a while in his parents' kitchen to some pleasure of the family, so he wasn't a blank newbie.
We checked out restaurants and cooking together, with me doing the most of the effort to make, for example, chui mai at home, but we were both interested. On the other hand, when he did cook, he had a great sense of it, and he remains (well he is still quite alive but his new wife does the cooking) one of the best people I know for making a meal make sense, riff, as a whole, he had an instinct toward chefdom that he didn't explore.
But, that is how I met him, he didn't have this blanket idea that I would do all the cooking.
For most of our years, cooking was playing and satisfying, not regimented or expected by either person.
But, hey, I was lucky. For many it is an expected chore for life, and I can only imagine how that kills flights of food fancy.
Miklos7 wrote:ehBeth, Nice idea! I like the idea of the pre-prepared frozen meals--there could be some of HER favorites in the freezer, too.
I agree with you that changing someone's eating habits may not be worth "getting twisted up about," but it is a health issue.
I still don't understand why he doesn't cook for her half the time, since they both work.
Montana, Anyone who says that cooking and cleaning is a woman's job is not worth your time. My father taught me how to do basic cooking, cleaning, sewing, and ironing, so that I would not be helpless--and a burden on some poor woman. That was 50 years ago; I think he was ahead of his time.
I agree that he should be cooking half the time and I'm glad you said that. You had me wondering for awhile there.
That father of yours sounds like a great man ;-)
