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Wed 19 Jan, 2005 11:37 am
"Having sex is like playing bridge. If you don't have a good partner, you'd better have a good hand." Woody Allen
"Bisexuality immediately doubles your chances for a date on Saturday night." Rodney Dangerfield
"There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women. Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz 500SL." Lynn Lavner
"Sex at age 90 is like trying to shoot pool with a rope." Camille Paglia
"Sex is one of the nine reasons for reincarnation. The other eight are unimportant." George Burns
"Women might be able to fake orgasms. But men can fake a whole relationship." Sharon Stone
"Hockey is a sport for white men. Basketball is a sport for black men. Golf is a sport for white men dressed like black pimps." Tiger Woods
"My mother never saw the irony in calling me a son-of-a-bitch." Jack Nicholson
"Clinton lied. A man might forget where he parks or where he lives, but he never forgets oral sex, no matter how bad it is." Barbara Bush
"Ah, yes, divorce, from the Latin word meaning to rip out a man's genitals through his wallet." Robin Williams
"Women need a reason to have sex. Men just need a place." Billy Crystal
"According to a new survey, women say they feel more comfortable undressing in front of men than they do undressing in front of other women. They say that women are too judgmental, where, of course, men are just grateful." Robert De Niro
"There's a new medical crisis. Doctors are reporting that many men are having allergic reactions to latex condoms. They say they cause severe swelling. So what's the problem?" Dustin Hoffman
"There's very little advice in men's magazines, because men think, 'I know what I'm doing. Just show me somebody naked'." Jerry Seinfeld
"See, the problem is that God gives men a brain and a penis, and only enough blood to run one at a time." Robin Williams
"It's been so long since I've had sex, I've forgotten who ties up whom." Joan Rivers
"Sex is one of the most wholesome, beautiful and natural experiences money can buy." Steve Martin
"You don't appreciate a lot of stuff in school until you get older. Little things like being spanked every day by a middle-aged woman. Stuff you pay good money for in later life." Elmo Phillips
"Bigamy is having one wife too many. Monogamy is the same." Oscar Wilde
"It isn't premarital sex if you have no intention of getting married." George Burns
"My girlfriend always laughs during sex - no matter what she's reading."
Steve Jobs
Sex is like cocaine...the worst I ever had was wonderful.....
Sex on television can't hurt unless you fall off.
"There are a number of mechanical devices that increase sexual arousal, particularly in women. Chief amongst these is the Mercedes-Benz 380L convertible."
PJ O'Rourke
"What's the three words you never want to hear while making love? Honey, I'm home."
Ken Hammond.
"Sex is God's joke on human beings."
Bette Davis
"Like most men, I am consumed with desire whenever a lesbian gets within twenty feet."
Taki.
"There is nothing wrong with making love with the light on. Just make sure the car door is closed."
George Burns
"You don't appreciate a lot of stuff in school until you get older. Little things like being spanked every day by a middle aged woman: Stuff you pay good money for in later life."
Emo Philips.
"I am always looking for meaningful one night stands."
Dudley Moore
My wife is a sex object - every time I ask for sex, she objects. (Les Dawson)
Once you try black you never go back.
Zane wrote:Once you try black you never go back.
once you go white....you go back to black...
By all means marry; if you get a good wife, you'll become happy; if you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher. (Socrates)
"I never got girls when I was a kid. One girl told me, 'Come on over, there's nobody home.' I went over. There was nobody home."
Rodney Dangerfield
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