Wed 16 Aug, 2017 05:41 am
Hi all just some advice needed, my boyfriend and I have great sex but only every 2 or 3 weeks and usually when hes had a bit to drink as he says it makes him last longer this I know is true, he enjoys pegging which I love to give him but says he never ever tried before, but from 1st time it was easy with him a 6 inch strap on was no problem, I know he loves woman as he always looks and loves to talk about pussy etc, but a couple of months ago after the sex between us got a lot less ( we been together 2 years) I started getting suspicious he doesn't like to be in tamale with me cuddle kiss etc anytime now, I went into his phone something I would never do normally but I had to know if he was cheating, he is on lots of gay/bi sites asking for just fun, hornet grrr bi love loads of sites talking to men showing pics of his cock give Inf his number out and telling them what he wants to do to them he says to them all he never tried anything before but wants to and arranges to meet etc from what I see he hasn't met any yet but these sites/ messages coupled with are fast dwindling sex life and the fact he loves pegging with such ease I'm worried sick , I'm not bothered about his secret at all I could live with it if it's a need in him but he would never tell me or be honest ( he a Portuguese strong catholic man who's family would disown him) I'm worried I will lose a man I love and a relationship that is great apart from anything to do with sex my question is is he bi curious and given the ease that basically his bottom took the strap on first time has this been going on a lot longer than I think
Hell, he sounds like a closeted gay man to me.
Certainly a person would not be on gay dating sites if they weren't gay or bi.
Time for a conversation.
For some people, the anus is an erogenous zone, so don't think he is gay or straight or bi because of your mutually agreed upon sex life. (You like it too, remember?)
" I'm not bothered about his secret at all I could live with it if it's a need in him" So - you wouldn't mind his "little secret." (being bi) Now you have to decide how that is going to work out in your relationship.
The phone sites and his reaching out for relationships and exhibitionism concerns you, so that needs to be discussed. He is soliciting for sex acts and you are considering that as cheating on you.
How is this all going to work out so that you are comfortable with him being with you AND having other relationships on the side?
Perhaps a sex therapist could help you work all this out.