Having family members keep child

Are you worried that this family member is a danger to the child or are you just being spiteful and using your child in an attempt to control the situation?

If it's the former, it would be reasonable to work out an alternative arrangement so the child gets to parent.

If it's the latter, stop being terrible and be a better co-parent. Custody and visitation is challenging enough without the adults acting like children. Be an adult, act like an adult, and think of the child that is getting the shitty end of the deal here.

Yes, you have the right to keep your child in your custody if you find him/her harmful to your child.

The more you can co-operate with your ex, the better it is for your child. Playing these games doesn't help anyone. If it makes life easier for your ex to get some help from a family member, then what's the problem? If you support your ex, especially when it doesn't really cost you anything then he or she will support you.

I don't know if you have a legal right to do this (I hope you don't). For that you will have to talk to a lawyer.

But why not support the other parent of your child instead of fighting? Good parents learn how to co-parent peacefully for the good of their children.

Apart from the sensible advice not to be petty....
If you think this is the ex starting to try and palm off his responsibilities, better to put a stop to it quick smart!
I am pretty sure court orders on custody arrangements cannot be modified without the agreement of both parties.

No! This is horrible advice. And it is contradictory. There is nothing more aggravating than an ex-spouse who makes ultimatums on how you are as a parent.. That is the very definition of them being "petty".

My ex-wife and I have a basic agreement; mom's house mom's rules, dad's house dad's rules. We talk respectfully if there are concerns... but the key word is respectfully.

If I ever told my ex-wife that I was going to "put a stop it quick" to something she was doing with our daughter, she would tell me to shove it up my ass (and she would be correct in doing so). I would do likewise if she made demands on how I parent.

Co-parenting takes respect on the part of both parties.

So you mean to say if your ex started doing things differently to what was stipulated by the court, you would not worry? .....Oh wait your talking about things the other parent has every rite to do..... OBVIOUSLY
(Try reading the post you are replying to next time)
And dont conveniently leave out the part in my post that makes your post WRONG

If my ex-wife sent her sister to pick up my daughter... I would support that. When it is her time, she is responsible for our daughter. I don't interfere. Maybe my ex-wife is working late, or maybe her sister is in the area. There is no reason for me to be a jerk about it.

I care about my daughter, and supporting her mom in any way I can is good for my daughter. Being an asshole about whatever is "stipulated by the court" would be ridiculous. My ex feels the same way.

My ex and I are co-operating, we support each other when it comes to our daughter. I haven't worried about the "court stipulation" in years. I kind of remember what it says... but we aren't being jerks about it. It was kind of funny, we had a hard time negotiating it during the divorce, but we both soon got over it and realized that fighting didn't do anyone any good.

When my ex-wife is working for a weekend she is supposed to have my daughter, I cover. When I want to take my daughter for a week to New York (as I did recently) my wife supports it. The parenting plan we fought over during the divorce quickly went out the window when we realized it is far better to just put our daughter first.

If you care more about fighting with your ex, then you care about cooperating for the good of your child you are screwing up as parent.

People who fight over "court stipulations" are failing as parents.

The things you say are perfectly reasonable, but for some reason you seem to be using it as argument against my post.

Just in case i did not make myself clear... i am thinking about 'dead beat' parents that try to weasel out of responsibilities for their children, its a big problem. I dont want to see that kind of thing start happening to this woman because of all the naive posters like you.