How to tell if you live in a Blue State or a Red State

Reply Tue 9 Nov, 2004 09:08 pm
Blue States: Home of good schools
Red States: Homeskooled good

Blue States: Want a big tent for their Party.
Red States: Wears a big tent to her party.

Blue States: Favor electric cars
Red States: Favor electric chairs

Blue States: Concerned about ballooning deficits' effect on capital markets turning gains into thin air
Red States: Concerned about whether it's demons that make balloons float in thin air

Blue States: Dream of making enough money to kite and swim with Czechs in Biarritz
Red States: Dream of kiting enough checks to swim in Schlitz

Blue States: Favor institutionalized health care for the poor
Red States: Favor institutionalizing the poor

Blue States: After the 9/11 attacks, put coffins in the ground
Red States: After the 9/11 attacks, put magnetic flags on the car

Blue States: Forget that God did not give Adam a Steve
Red States: Forget that not only did God give Abraham three wives, He gave Solomon 300 concubines

Blue States: Enormous cities that serve as the engines of human progress
Red States: Enormous Hummers that serve as the engines for Arab oil

Blue States: Provide the "tax" part of "tax and spend"
Red States: Provide the "spend on a new 8-lane highway to link a Wal-Mart to the Olive Garden" part of "tax and spend"

Blue States: Believe we're all brothers and sisters under the skin.
Red States: Don't mind if we're brothers and sisters under the sheets.

Blue States: Fighting to clean up skid row
Red States: Fighting to clean up skid marks

Blue States: Concerned about global warming
Red States: Don't like to travel and are too fat to fit in an airline seat anyway, so glad to hear that the tropics are coming to Texas. Yee-haw!

Blue States: Follow Jesus, but don't believe in Him
Red States: Believe in Jesus, but don't follow Him

Blue States: Want to repeal the Patriot Act
Red States: Want to repeal the Emancipation Proclamation

Blue States: Looking for a method to weaken China every day
Red States: Sold everyday china for a weekend of meth

Blue States: Favor drafting annoying laws on assault rifles
Red States: Assault annoying in-laws with rifles after being drafted

Blue States: Want the right for everyone to worship as they choose
Red States: Want the right to choose everyone's worship

Blue States: Women wrestling with the right to choose
Red States: Choose women's wrestling

Blue States: Want a rational energy policy
Red States: Want policy of energetic irrationalism

Blue States: Used benefits to assist victims on account of attacks
Red States: Used attacks to benefit Toby Keith's bank account

Blue States: Watched friends in New York die in foxy attacks on America
Red States: Attacked New York on Fox for not being friends of America

Blue States: Believe God loves us and gave everyone free will to be different
Red States: Believe God willed us to freely hate everyone different

Blue States: Believe absence makes the heart grow fonder
Red States: Believe abstinence saves the tart from plunder

Blue States: Believe in Mr. Darwin's theory of "Evolution"
Red States: Believe in Mr. Jesus' "Talking Snake" theory

Blue States: Slave to pay inheritance taxes
Red States: Inherited slaves

Blue States: Buy art
Red States: Collect Beanie Babies
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Type: Discussion • Score: 1 • Views: 2,342 • Replies: 22
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Reply Tue 9 Nov, 2004 09:21 pm
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Reply Wed 10 Nov, 2004 03:20 am
I thought you was gonna get more flac for that one, diddie...
Good though, real good!
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Reply Wed 10 Nov, 2004 06:42 pm
And many good things about the Red States can be said, and many bad thing about the commie blue states can be said.
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Reply Wed 10 Nov, 2004 06:54 pm
Damn Alaskans!
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Reply Wed 10 Nov, 2004 06:57 pm
I hate bigots.
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Reply Wed 10 Nov, 2004 06:57 pm
Can anyone recommend a good cheese to go with this liberal whine? Anyone?
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Reply Wed 10 Nov, 2004 06:58 pm
One would think the Alaskans should be blue. Especially given Dubya's propensity to rape the planet and the fact that he is now gazing northward, toward Alaska, with his eye on their oilfields.

Oh, well, they'll soon learn the error of their ways.
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Reply Wed 10 Nov, 2004 09:24 pm
I voted Red State and Hate It. Not that I hate my state, you understand, just the fact that it's Red.
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Reply Wed 10 Nov, 2004 10:43 pm
Heeeeyyyy!!! Canada's been eaten alive!!!!!

Look, why don't we strike up a bargain. Those of you in the blue states could cecede and join canada. After all, a more canadian standard of living is similar to your desires. It would be a win win situation. Canada would gain more beachfront property and the cracks about it being so cold up here would finally end.
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Reply Wed 10 Nov, 2004 10:59 pm
Rolling Eyes
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Reply Fri 19 Nov, 2004 07:04 pm
You're ridiculously liberal. Look who won the election? The right man. So you mus be wrong. And besides, you left wingers are pussies.
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Reply Sun 21 Nov, 2004 02:16 am
it's not a good idea to make fun of people that have as many guns as us Red state folks.

that was a joke not threat

but i must say it's nice to know you practice what you preach . you know , all of that tolerance for people who choose life styles different from your own . Go look up the word hypocrite.
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Reply Sun 21 Nov, 2004 06:03 am
Can't speak for the other hypocrites, but personally I don't extend the principle of tolerance to the intolerant.

You can co-exist with other folks when they agree to tend their own business, but not when they think their business is legislating your lifestyle as well as their own. Then you got to draw a line.
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Reply Tue 21 Dec, 2004 01:36 am
All generalities are false ... including this one. :wink:
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Reply Sun 2 Jan, 2005 05:49 pm
One generalization that is documented as fact, if we're going to generalize. One way to tell if you live in a red state... You are much more likely to donate to others in need, even though you don't have as much as the wealthiest Americans in the blue states.

NATIONAL 2004 Generosity Index 2004: (2002 US State Data)

Generosity Index >
1. Advanced Data:

2004_Generosity_Index.xls (an Excel document with multiple sheets -- split by AGI brackets -- with detailed data from 2002 and rankings)

2. Basic Data:

Rank ---- Rank in income Generosity Index
Mississippi .......50................1
Arkansas .........47.................2
South Dakota....44.................7
South Carolina..40.................9
West Virginia....48................13
Nebraska......... 35.................14
North Dakota....46..................15
North Carolina..27...............16

Catalogue For Philanthropy From NPR--
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Reply Tue 4 Jan, 2005 03:17 am
Greyfan hit the nail on the head. If each group were not trying to control the other, nobody would give a rats butt what the other guys thought. But we are in a battle for control. If we win, tolerance will be the norm (which means our ideals will win, since they are better and will thrive in an open environment). But if the reds win, it will become standard policy to make second class citizens out of everyone who doesn't fit in a certain mold.
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Merry Andrew
Reply Tue 4 Jan, 2005 03:39 am
Something's been troubling me for quite a while now. Does anyone know how it is that the Republican states got to be known as Red? It used to be that Red was the color of the Communist Party and the right-wingers would play the 'Red card', denouncing all liberals as a bunch of Reds. Now they've co-opted the color? I don't get it.
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Reply Tue 4 Jan, 2005 08:41 am
I agree. Democrats are so much more like Communists -- they should be the "Reds." I've not researched to find out why it is, but it doesn't make sense to me either.
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Reply Tue 4 Jan, 2005 09:21 am
Ticomaya wrote:
I agree. Democrats are so much more like Communists -- they should be the "Reds." I've not researched to find out why it is, but it doesn't make sense to me either.

Rolling Eyes
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