gustavratzenhofer wrote:Do I detect a little hesitation on your part?
No. A lot.
This little satire in from a New Zealand site:
O'Neill To Enter Witness Protection Program
O'Neill to enter witness protection program
Cheney reportedly contemplating post-emptive strike on former
Treasury secretary.
Satire from. freepressed.com
Caption: Ex-Treasury Secretary Paul O'Neill waves goodbye to
the press and the American public Wednesday before entering the
Federal Witness Protection Program.
Somewhere in Canada-- Former Treasury Secretary Paul O'Neill
announced Wednesday that he would be undergoing plastic surgery
and entering the Federal Witness Protection Program before he
finds himself "sleeping with the fishes."
The extraordinary measure is necessary, O'Neill says, because
of his recent criticism of Bush's presidency in which he likened
the president to a "low-functioning baboon" taking orders from
neoconservative Neanderthals in the administration.
"I never said that. That's a gross exaggeration of my words for
comic effect," O'Neill protested.
But In a CBS 60 Minutes interview on Sunday, O'Neill revealed
that President Bush believes the tax cuts are "money given away
to rich people," the administration was hell-bent on invading
Iraq from the first day of Bush's presidency, and the administration
had a plan for divvying up Iraq's oil contracts after the invasion
and occupation as early as March of 2001.
"I can't imagine that I'm going to be attacked for telling the
truth," O'Neill said in what was either the most naive or politically
cunning statement ever uttered.
The next day the White House announced that O'Neill was under
investigation for leaking classified documents in the 60 Minutes
interview and two days later a professional hit had been put
on O'Neil's head, bought and paid for by the Office of the Vice
President.
Caption: Looking back, President Bush wishes he would have slapped
some sense into O'Neill when he had him within arms reach.
"My ticker skipped about five beats when I heard what O'Neill
was blabbing about on national TV. I went through half a bottle
of my nitroglycerin pills over that one." Vice President Dick
Cheney said. "It sure would be a shame if something was to happen
to him, say, oh I don't know, a piano should land on top of his
head several times until he's dead."
O'Neill finally got the threa...hint and began back tracking
on his earlier statements, saying that he would still vote for
Bush even though the president lied about the tax cuts and was
never serious about finding a peaceful resolution to the standoff
with Iraq.
"Aside from the deception, the illegal war, and the fact that
he wants me dead, I still like the Prez. One thing's for sure,
he beats any of the sore loserman Democratic candidates."
But O'Neill's about face wasn't good enough for the administration
and now he says he has been forced to take dramatic measures.
"Bush may be like a blind man in a roomful of deaf people, but
I don't want any of his goons to recognize me. So I'm going to
have some major, reconstructive plastic surgery done and become
scarce."
The president said, as far as he's concerned, O'Neill is dead
to him.
"Yeah, I'm missin' ya already," he said. "Don't let the door
hit ya' where the dog shoulda bit ya!"
