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Thu 9 Mar, 2017 04:16 pm
The only thing I excel at is being a student. Everything started going downhill exactly 2 years ago, and I've reached my threshold, but I feel helpless. 2 years ago, as a 16 year old, I was in good shape, I was exercising, I was enjoying myself, now nothing. I had exams and stress got the better of me, and it evolved to stress eating, and me going from 70ish kg to around 100 kg and being moderately obese. After my exams I finished that education and moved on to a new one at a new school, and I have since then not been able to get a hold of my life. And in these 2 years I have befriended some great people, and let go of others. I have had some great times, but all I am left with is a broken heart and soul with the memories and illusions of the good times. It always feels like the negative things outshine the positives. From the massive weight gain my body has been filled with stretch marks that I can't afford to remove professionally (I am trying creams and derma rolling), and this is on top of my obesity and my previous bodily insecurities. I just wish I could rip my blouse off, but sadly I am too insecure atm. One time I had whole month of trying to turn my life around, and it was going well, and then bang out of the blue I am involved in a car accident, one that EASILY could have been fatal, but luckily me and the others prevailed against death. Now I often overeat, to try and cover the pain. I have been diagnosed with back and neck injury after the car accident, and I attend physiotherapy twice a week due to the pain, which sometimes is very overwhelming for a young man like myself.
Now to my challenge I used to be an inspirational young man who had control over his life. I was motivated and hungry, and most important social, now these things are all either nonexistent or fading, and I desperately need help. I live in a supporting environment, and we have what we need, but we still live from paycheck to paycheck, and both my parents are also currently going through some hard things, despite always being there for me and my siblings, and yet I am afraid of confiding in people. I have recently rediscovered that hunger, but I don't know where to start. I'd love if anyone would care to share a similar situation where they prevailed.
@jackyd00123,
You need to talk to a qualified therapist. Your family physician is a good place to start. Make it clear that you cannot afford fancy long-term treatments and it MUST be something you can get covered by your insurance.
If that is absolutely not going to happen, talk to the guidance counselor at your school (or the equivalent; I'm not certain what they are specifically called in the UK). They are not just trained to help you get into college. They are also, more and more these days, helping out with young folks who have body issues, are suicidal, are wondering about their sexuality, and more.
I urge you to get some help from an impartial professional. I am not a doctor but I suspect you are suffering from some degree of depression. At the very least, you will feel better if you unburden yourself.
Stress stinks, and I definitely understand about weight gain. You are not alone.
Just a hint about the weight gain: Cut out all sugar and substitute glycine, (which is sweet) instead. You might add just a tiny touch of honey, (about 1/8 tsp) with half a tsp of glycine, which is two grams. Glycine helps you reverse the damage sugar is doing to you, which includes among other things boosting your estrogen while simultaneously lowering your free testosterone. This helps to bring on depression in a man.
Your problems are much deeper than a simple supplement, so by all means get counseling for your depression. But substituting glycine, (which removes fat but leaves muscle alone, unlike simple calorie restriction), can at least get you started and build some momentum.
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