What did my ex meant?

Reply Fri 30 Dec, 2016 11:26 pm
Basically I'm 16 who prefers/likes older men because they're matured in some way and can understand better than guys my age. Basically I was dating a 20 year old military guy. And we instantly had a connection, we instantly hit it off. And we broke things off when I told him I was 16.. because I lied to him about my age told him I was 17 so it was okay for him because he thought I was turning 18. And we already planned things how we're gonna see each other since he's based in Okinawa and I'm in the Philippines and we met when he was here in the Philippines although we have never seen each other in person. But he basically liked me and the feelings mutual. Then when we broke things off he said he just wanted to be friends and I agreed and didn't fight for him even though I liked him so much. Basically there's this other guy who's in love with me and I turned him down because I told him I was still liked the military guy and I told him not to tell the military guy but he didn't listen and still told him, then the military guy messaged me asking if what the guy who was in love with me said was true. Basically here's how the conversation went...

Military guy: "Yo is what he said is true"
Me: "what did he exactly say?"
Military guy: "I'm not trying to get him in trouble or anything so just forget it bud"
Me: "lmao not at all, me and him are friends now so it's whatever"
MG: "just that for some reason you're still into me"
Me: "oh? Does it matter?"

Now this is the part where I don't understand what he meant...
Military guy: "I'm just saying you're 16, I'm 20. You just need to focus on what you want seems to me."
^ what does that mean?????? I have no idea, anyways continuing with the conversation.

Me: "it doesn't matter anymore, past is past haha"
MG: "what do you mean?"
Me: "I'm just saying, it doesn't matter anymore."
MG: "yeah, you're right"

Thoughts anyone? And what does he mean by the you just need to focus on what you want seems to me?
Reply Sat 31 Dec, 2016 01:40 am
He worded it wrong, but I think he meant that you have to focus on the things that you like. I don't know. Do you still want you and him to be together?
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Reply Sat 31 Dec, 2016 07:44 am
"we met when he was here in the Philippines although we have never seen each other in person."


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Reply Sat 31 Dec, 2016 08:30 am
Thoughts anyone? And what does he mean by the you just need to focus on what you want seems to me?

My guess is it means he got a whiff that you have another guy in your life and you should decide if you want him there or not. And maybe he is encouraging you to focus on this other guy because he has already decided you and he are a dead end because of your age.

Be aware that he could be court marshalled (put in jail) if your relationship was physical and it was discovered. He might well be thinking of that.
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Reply Sat 31 Dec, 2016 08:47 am
Wait until you're 18 and date anyone else over 18 you like.

Your military pal has realized he could get into massive trouble and is likely thinking of his future. So cut it out and leave the guy alone.
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Reply Sat 31 Dec, 2016 11:53 am
Basically, you are 16 and you could mess up the careers of these slightly older young men.

Until you're 18, basically, you need to date guys who are younger than 18 because, basically, you're ******* them up.

Do not lie to them about your age because, basically, that's an asshole move.
Reply Sat 31 Dec, 2016 12:12 pm
Yeah, basically in a nutshell.
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Reply Sun 1 Jan, 2017 03:45 pm
She's in the Phillipines. Their age of consent may be lower (here in Australia, it's 16). She may not have realised the implications it has on people from other countries. And her age lie may have had more to do with social acceptances than her understanding of foreign laws.

But yeah, she needs to avoid older Americans - which of course includes anyone in their military.
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