dating question

We sometimes over analyze stuff here...phone etiquette shouldn't be included in morality and intimacy

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i'm not saying me being intimate with him is right. I guess i dont consider a handjob to be that intimate, but i'm guessing i'm from a different genertion than most of you. I'm not some ho who hooks up with everyone, i've slept with very few people, havent even given a stupid hand job to that many. i dont think us being "intimate" has anythign to do with him not calling. Guys do things like this whether there was handjobs involved or not.

Even though I'm from an older generation I'd have to guess that a majority of young women in the 16 to 26 age bracket consider a h/j rather intimate. I mean a woman giving an orgasm to a man through direct contact is pretty intimate. And vice versa too.

"Guys do things like this"- I guess girls don't...or do they?

Re: re


Wow! Make me feel old, why dontcha! I came "of age" during disco and casual sex being the norm, but one thing that hasn't changed is asking if you like the guy before you give a hand job to him. I mean, it's a little more intimate than a handshake, don'tcha think? Was his hand in your crotch petting you at the same time? Or was it a one way exchange? The way you described it in the op, you barely knew this guy, and the emphasis was on him. In the day of disco and casual sex, the emphasis was on the multiple orgasmic woman, and the man had to jump through our hoops... or at least that was my experience... Don't get me wrong, I care about getting the man off, too, but I expect 3 for his every one... You bargain with life for whatever you get, right???

Re: re
Welcome to A2K, Class!

My longest relationship to date (7 years), included first date fooling around. Sometimes the magic hits you faster and I don't see a damn thing wrong with it. It doesn't sound like there is any magic between you and this fella, so I wonder why you're analyzing so much in the first place.

Calls: Since this fella hasn't yet swept you off your feet, you have little to lose, so simply force his hand. Call him right now and if you get voice mail say: "Hey stud, I was just thinking about you and was thinking we should have dinner tomorrow night. Gimme a buzz." You'll have your answer shortly.

You will find that many answers will elude you unless you actually ask a question.

I know you didn't ask, but I'll toss this in for free. For future reference, BJs are sex. Anything that makes a man orgasm is sex. Blowing someone you're not interested in sex with, would be a huge turnoff for me. Don't get me wrong; hell will likely freeze over before I turn down a fourth date BJ, from anyone, for any reason... but it would most likely make me less interested in a real relationship, because that type of submissiveness is indicative of self esteem issues (which I try to avoid like the plague.) Knock me down, jumb my bones 20 minutes after we meet, and it could be the start of something beautiful. Wholly one-sided sexual encounters are wonderful gifts, but should be reserved for people you care deeply about.

Re: re


Well, the simple answer to that is, don't blow anyone you aren't interested in anymore, Bill!

(sorry, couldn't resist it!)

re
For future reference, BJs are sex.

I disagree wholeheartedly. You cant lose your virginity by giving someone a bj. Again maybe i did mess up in doing some things too soon, but if he really liked me he'd have called regardless of what i did. Live and learn.

What you say is true, but it isn't all about you. Disagree till the cows come home, but it won't change the male perspective on it. We don't require multiple orgasms for satisfaction like you do. It's one and done, that was fun, hon.

Btw, not necessarily too fast... too giving= unselfish= desperate= needy= low self esteem= damaged goods= do you see where I'm going here? And this effect may not even be through conscious thought… but it's there.
Quick, mutual good sex (sometimes) = Good Thing.
Quick, one-sided, easy sex (BJ, etc) = Beware.
Get it?