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Advise with unexpected visitors turning up at your home(friends)

 
 
troy95
 
Reply Sun 10 Jul, 2016 02:50 pm
A couple of my really close Friends have been away on holiday for about a month and they came back yesterday, we arranged a meet up date but they turned up at my house without prior warning when i was putting my daughter to sleep.
i texted them explaining that i could not speak at this time because i was busy.
they said that any of their other friends would have spared the time to come outside and talk to them,

they said not to bother talking to them for a while

what shall i do ?
 
roger
 
  3  
Reply Sun 10 Jul, 2016 03:30 pm
@troy95,
Don't talk to them for awhile.
0 Replies
 
Tes yeux noirs
 
  1  
Reply Sun 10 Jul, 2016 03:32 pm
If it was me, I'd be making that "while" a long one.
0 Replies
 
engineer
 
  3  
Reply Sun 10 Jul, 2016 04:40 pm
@troy95,
Kind of a strange case. They showed up at your house and you texted them you were busy? Where were they when you texted, the front yard? Did you actually see them? Sending someone at your front door a text to go away (if that is what happened) does sound a little off-putting. Since they are really close friends, you could have told them you had to tuck in little Suzi, but come on in and help themselves to beers in the fridge and you'll be with them in a half hour. Likewise since they are apparently not nearby neighbors, it would have made since for them to call first before showing up. Could you give us more detail?
troy95
 
  1  
Reply Mon 11 Jul, 2016 02:04 am
@engineer,
They pulled up outside in their car and texted saying they would be outside in a minute, I texted back saying I can't come out and see them as if I would have left the room my daughter would of stayed up even longer as it had taken almost 2 hours to settle her down.

So couldn't talk in person because if I moved from my spot it would of awaken her if you know what I mean lol
engineer
 
  2  
Reply Mon 11 Jul, 2016 06:27 am
@troy95,
I can see everyone's position here, but what is done is done. I suggest you continue to be open to the friendship and consistent that you regret the way your friends feel but you did nothing wrong. If they choose to make a mountain out of a molehill that is their concern.

It is not uncommon for couples who were friends before kids to drift apart after kids. This couple thinks they can be spontaneous and show up anytime. Maybe that was you once upon a time, but not now. Only someone without children would think they could show up at bedtime and command your attention. I do think there is a middle ground where you say "busy now, but available in a half hour", but that's for next time.

On a slightly related topic, you need a better bedtime routine.
0 Replies
 
 

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