Having an affair...what to do next?

Reply Tue 5 Jul, 2016 03:09 pm
I been married for about 10 years now. I love my husband, but he does not provide all that I want and need. Anyhow, I started an affair, with a friend from high school, two years ago. He is also married. He recently lost his job and I found out that I am responsible. Back in April, we had sex in his office, we thought no one was around and I was loud. However, we were mistaken, people did hear us and someone saw me leave. His co-workers thought that I was one of his clients and several co-workers reported him. He lost his job about a month ago, even though the "client" disputed the claims, and there was not proof of him engaging with his clients inappropriately...its all hearsay. He does not and has not told anyone that it was me and not the clients, he doesn't want to complicate things for me. I did not realize that I was mistaken as the "client" and how I feel responsible for him losing his job. I feel horrible and I don't know how to proceed. I feel like I owe him something. I've considered approaching his employers but I think that would make things worse for the both of us.
Tes yeux noirs
Reply Tue 5 Jul, 2016 03:41 pm
Haven't you done enough already? I feel sorry for his wife and your husband. Having sex in the office is gross misconduct whoever it was with. Maybe you deserve each other.

I was loud


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Reply Wed 6 Jul, 2016 10:10 am
I feel like I owe him something.
Don't you feel as though you owe your husband something? Like being honest about how you feel about your marriage.

I love my husband
Than why are you spreading your legs for some other married man? Oh yeah, this...
he does not provide all that I want and need.
Wanna bet this is simply you trying to justify your affair? Have you ever talked to him? You know, a real conversation about your relationship? No, you haven't. Because if you had and nothing really changed, then you would have separated. But no, it is so much easier to have an affair than to work on a relationship.

I feel like I owe him something
No, you do not. He is getting what he deserves for screwing you in his office. I wonder what he told his wife about his job loss.

I've considered approaching his employers but I think that would make things worse for the both of us.
And it likely would do no good. They probably would have fired him even if he had been screwing his wife in the office. Employers tend to frown upon that sort of thing. (Unless you are the president of the US.) Hopefully, someone at his former job feels sorry enough for his wife to give her a call and tell her about the loud noises that got him fired.

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Reply Mon 12 Sep, 2016 06:57 pm
You are embarrassing yourself. Having sex at your lover's place of work whilst his coworkers are still working. He got fired and rightfully so, body fluids in the work place like that is disgusting.

You are a married woman. If you are not getting what you want at home then get a divorce and don't say it's not that easy because people do it every single day.

Having an affair is not the way to go. Please stop giving men the impression that women are cheap.

Reply Wed 14 Sep, 2016 10:24 pm
As bad ass I am...you upstaged me by 10 miles!
Let me just tell you sister...you are an idiot!
And it comes from a person who never judge!
Your story is as ridiculous as it goes.
Grow up! Or shut up!
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Reply Wed 14 Sep, 2016 10:32 pm
Women are cheap. Didn't you get it in your sex school?
Of course except those who had never been seduced...those are just miserable
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