Felling lonely and not happy.

Reply Sat 4 Jun, 2016 01:21 pm
This is my first time writting this type of post. I don't know if it is going to help me, but I will try this after all. So, I will go straight on point. I'm not happy and I'm felling lonely. Big deal you say? Maybe. I came here to write and understand myself better, not to whine and complain about hard and meaningless life. My question is- why? I have friends, but I don't think they are my true friends. They never call me or write just to talk, or meet. Usually I arrange meeting for whole group, but for some reason if I'm not doing inviting to a meating or party I'm not invited. Why? I'm trying to be friendly with everyone, trying to find a way to every person. I heard people call me friendly, kind and good person. But still I can sit all weekend and my phone or facebook wont get any massage or a call. I'm student a good student, by the way. So, after some courses university offered me a job. I met new people, smart and beautiful. But still I feel some sadness, like something is missing. I'm 21, and I don't have girlfriend. I have been in relationships, one of them last for almost 2 years but we broke up. Now I don't even think about relationships, I just want to talk to people, share what I have been up to, to life, to feel. I'm not tall, but sporty young man. Attending gym for 3 years or more.
Sometimes I really giving up on myself and doing nothing. Then someting happens and I starting to fight againg, but this power of fighting is weaker and weaker everytime.
I'm willng to help others almost everytime, even if I know that I'm gonna suffer. And I know that nobody gonna do same for me. Sometimes I really want that someone just called me or to ask how is my day or what's new in life, just help me in this hard momemt when they happen in life. Nobody. Always going through changes alone. Keeping every filling inside. Not long ago I both a car. I f*cking talk to my car, while I'm crusing alone, listening to Hospital Records emotional drum and bass or Rudimental. By the way I'm writtng on my mobile from the car, parked now by the river. Whatching other people having fun toghether, playing ball, talking. I'm dying to do the same. And I really like life. Even if I'm lonely, I really like life. Sunsets, flying birds, beatiful people around in the city all this things keep me breating, I just tired to be a spectator in life. Anyone... help me with some of advise, I just don't have more motivation to fight for nothing, cause I feel, like I have nothing.
P.S sorry for my bad english.
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Reply Sat 4 Jun, 2016 01:37 pm
Okay, first off, if you go into friendships just expecting to get something out of them, you're kind of doing it wrong. It's not that we don't get affection and companionship out of friends - we do! But we don't keep weights and measures.

That being said, some people are just more likely to be planners and organizers than others. You seem to be one of those people, and you are attracting and retaining friends who are the kinds of folks who enjoy the fruits of planning and organizing but don't seem to do too much of it themselves. There is no reason whatsoever you can't sit one of those people down and, in a calm manner, ask them to include you the next time they are doing something fun. You're friends, right? Then you should be able to talk about this. Do this with a few friends, on a one on one basis. In person. No group texts!

Don't assume exclusion or nastiness unless it is proven. Right now, if you have anything at all proven, it's inattention and carelessness.

Give people a chance to rectify things and invite you, but don't expect anything engraved. But don't give them infinite chances. Revisit things in six months, I would say. If you are still dissatisfied, seek other friends.
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Reply Sat 4 Jun, 2016 09:47 pm
Change friends from the superficial to real people..
Accept that you play a part in your loneliness.
Don't expect other people to entertain you.
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Reply Sun 5 Jun, 2016 05:32 am
Perhaps you lack a feeling of belonging, as to a dedicated group or social circle other than one requiring simple friendship. Have you thought of joining a team, or a common-interest group, club, or even a martial art school? Something that isn't just for a season or for this stage of your life, but something with a future and a foreseeable position of responsibility in which you can make a positive impact on others.
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