Feeling left behind

Sat 16 Jan, 2021 06:36 pm
Hi guys, I’m looking for some way to stay positive and hopeful.
Recently, I have started to left behind in life. And I tell myself everyday that people have different timescales in life and not to worry about what my friends and others are doing but it really is getting me down.
I’m 25 years old and I’m still living at my parents house. I have 3 really close friends and about a year ago all our lives were very similar. Some were still living at home in on and off relationships and we were all at very similar stages of life. However, during the lockdown in April my relationship with my now ex boyfriend went downhill very quickly and I am now single. It was for the best it ended, but due to lockdowns/staying at home I can’t get out there and try and meet someone else so I have times when I feel very lonely.
One of my friends has moved in with her boyfriend and they’re expecting a baby. Another friend has just bought her first home with her boyfriend. And my other friend has began to settle down in another relationship. Don’t get me wrong, I am so so so happy for them and I love them all to death and they deserve all the happiness in the world. However their new circumstances mean they don’t the same time for our friendship like before. We still talk as much as possible but I feel like we are starting to drift.
Im a very outgoing person and love to go out and dance and have a good time but I’m just struggling to keep positive about it and worry my friends are going to eventually be too busy for me. I’d love to meet new friends who are in the same situation as me but it’s just so difficult these days to make new friends.
Is anyone else currently in this same situation? If so, what do you do to pick yourself back up when you feel low?
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Thu 21 Jan, 2021 09:05 am

First of all , I appreciate the fact that you decided to put it out here .
This feeling of being left behind is very common in this particular age group (20-30) being myself as a 25 years old , i can 100% relate to it . Knowing the fact that everyone has their own timescale is absolutely true but it only helps to a little extent.
In my opinion, the first thing you should start with is a Gratitude practice, i know its a very cliche advice but trust me it will help. Reminding yourself how lucky you’re to have everything around you and seeing your loved ones when you can , is a true blessing. How the things would be if you were born in an extreme circumstances , where you have to struggle to have good food and clothes ( how would the life be in that case).

Once you’re in a genuinely neutral or positive state of mind ,write on a paper what would you love to do ( 50 things ) . Getting a dance lesson , taking a solo trip , meeting someone new at a cafe.
And trust me you’ve got a lottt of time . Don’t worry about being married , buying a house. Once you’re genuinely happy with your life , your brain will subconsciously start revealing you ways to be more productive and ultimately earning more money and will also attract the right person for you . I’m sure you’ll be able to get anything you want .

Don’t force yourself for anything, calm down, flow like water. Start by accepting where you are right now.

Meditation, gratitude, positive books or podcasts.

All the best .
Shine on you crazy diamond, its just a beginning.
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