I need to hear a womans point of view (ASAP)

'I reached out to her for help with my resume."

Oops! Wrong person to ask for help.

But a DIVORCE? That's pretty extreme.

What ELSE happened?

I'm in this situation now confused!!!!

Well, what exactly was in those emails your wife found? If the content was simply a few suggestions on updating your resume, I don't think there would be a problem. I suspect those emails went beyond that subject, enough so to make your wife feel betrayed.

Trust me if there was anything of that sort I would have deleted it and dumped the trash ) That is why I am so confused about her wanting to go to such extremes. That is why I need to hear some truths from women, as to what is really going on in her head. I always show her attention. There is no doubt in her mind that I try my best to spoil her.... She even says it I am SPOILED !! referring to herself.

Are you sure your wife hasn't been looking for a reason to get divorced?

no I am not

Are you sure, She had only seen your - help with the resume - mails. Because I can't find any reason in asking for the divorce on this basis.

I will check my emails, but I know that I have not cheated on my wife. I have not been with anyone, ( That is why I was thinking that it is an emotional thing? I Dunno Any help would be appreciated Really!!

If you want to know what's going on in your wife's head, ask her! Talk to her. Find out from her what it will take to save your marriage. None of us have walked in her shoes for the last twenty years. We can only speculate, which is of no use to you.

Your wife is full of crap. It is not easy to be stuck with someone so controlling. No one deserves this.

Whether or not you end up splitting, your first priority should be to get a job. What is ridiculous is with her behavior, she is likely hurting herself financially.

Take care of yourself.

You said your wife doesn't trust you.

"Trust me if there was anything of that sort I would have deleted it and dumped the trash" was what you just answered to Debra Law.

So, should she trust you?

The mere fact that you would have deleted it, to me suggests you would have had those types of converstations had she not had seen the emails.

I also suspect she knows this lady, or of her. And just seeing her name suggests that you want to or have cheated, perhaps she is in-secure because a woman who knows 100% that her Husband would not cheat would crack up maybe or laugh, but not go to the extreme of suggesting Divorce .

I also always think, that if a person has nothing to worry about they don't worry as the truth will prevail be it now or a bit later.

One that screams for help, now, quick, now, something is amiss with your information I think.

It's almost as if to me, you did delete "some" emails and she knows it.

Women are not stupid, heck "people" for that matter aren't male or female.

Forbidden fruit, she is a past woman of your life and you accepted the bait, your wife knows that.

You hit the nail on the head!! she was a GF from about twenty years ago. We are not like that (N0thing sexual) besides she is in NJ and I am in NC. It was simply a friend trying to assist me in getting back on my feet. Also I never deleted any emails. I Love my wife very much, she is truly my world..... We has separated once in the pass but reunited and got married this time. However like most young men I would flirt as a youngster. and I guess she still remembers that. I am 53 now and those days are GONE!! I have a woman that I can trust with my life and have. A little over a year ago I was in a coma and she did not pull the plug on me and for that I will always be in her debt.

I have been doing Contract work but still not the same as a job with benefits,401k ETC.

SHE REFUSES TO CONVERSATE ON THIS TOPIC....But thanks anyway

Divorce worked well for me.

I wonder if you had anything vested in your marriage? I do

Did you tell your wife that your ex talked to you and would like to help you get a job? I think you should have told her beforehand about that so she wouldn't be surprised to see the email.

Just one more example of people ignoring what the real issue is in 'cheating'.

If you have empty sex with someone (she meant NOTHING to me!), it might be hard but that can be forgiven.

If you actually LOVE someone else (with no sex involved) but still want your marriage, that WILL NOT be forgiven.

What kind of sick ******* world have we made.

Your lack of respect speaks volumes. I understand why she refuses to talk to you because you're dismissive and condescending. Keep doing what you're doing. Maybe that will save your marriage, or not.