If a girl says she's busy, is she really busy, or making excuses?

Reply Fri 5 Feb, 2016 10:48 am
I hung out with a girl--as friends, and then sometime later asked her to hang out again. She said she was super busy (which is believable--she's in grad school). idk if she thinks I'm trying to be more than friends and is worried, or if she is legitimately busy with all the demands. I thought I was pretty clear I wanted to be just friends--I don't want to get in the way of her schoolwork, but I just feel a little let down that we won't be able to spend much time together--even as just friends. She doesn't really seem like the type to just exclude friends for no reason, but idk. She said since she was busy, she couldn't "commit" to anything else. I don't know really what that means, but I wasn't looking for any type of serious commitment--more or less just looking for a friend.
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Type: Question • Score: 5 • Views: 1,087 • Replies: 7

Reply Fri 5 Feb, 2016 02:50 pm
I'm in grad school. She's probably busy for real.
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Reply Fri 5 Feb, 2016 08:19 pm
I'm not in grad school so I don't know how much work but it seems like she isn't interested in being friends or otherwise. She may be unclear of your intentions or maybe she's just the type of person who is straightforward. This doesn't help much but those are my insights.
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Reply Fri 5 Feb, 2016 08:33 pm
Does it matter why she is too busy?

She's busy.

Reply Fri 5 Feb, 2016 10:23 pm
If she's busy in grad level courses, she's busy.

If she's washing her hair every time you call, maybe not.
Reply Fri 5 Feb, 2016 11:16 pm
Ok, for the record, the main thing throwing me off is that she used the word "commit." Maybe she views even just friendship as a commitment, but when I hear a girl use the word commit, I often think she's thinking in terms of serious relationship..and that's the main reason this is confusing me.
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Reply Fri 5 Feb, 2016 11:43 pm
Trying to work out why she uses the words she uses is a rather pointless exercise. If she was really interested, she would say something along the lines of "I'm busy that day, but how about..." and she offer an alternative.

If I were you, I'd just occasionally invite her along to things you were already going to. If she's too busy, it's no biggy - it's something you were going to whether or not she accepted your invite. If she declines too many times, move on.
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Jamie B
Reply Thu 18 Feb, 2016 04:43 pm
That hard to say it also depends on the situation I think. But most of the time I think it's an excuse.
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