@ehBeth,
Thanks for your up-beat comments, ehBeth! You are a nice person.
It was a nice holiday with my family, as it turned out. There was no tension this year. They are finally doing what I asked: namely, never bring up my ex-gf again in conversation.
I have met some nice women in the last few months, but nothing special. Just nice women with whom to share lunch, dinner, a drink, and conversation. There seems to be a lot of lonely, 30 and 40 something professional single women who are "schizophrenic"--trying to figure out the role of a relationship and the role of work. These are the high achievers who wonder if slowing down to have a relationship/family is a betrayal to their mental acuity. Anyway, that is their problem...it doesn't mean I can't enjoy their cerebral abilities in conversation, and many of them are kind of cute, too
I will talk to my workplace counseling center, which is part of my benefits package. Is that a good option? I think that the holidays are a busy time for counselors, right? Anyway, I'll talk to them.