0
   

A boy love me a lot and I am confused about him

 
 
love2
 
Reply Fri 30 Oct, 2015 12:56 pm
This boy loves me a lot. He always does everything for me. When I got admission in MBA he was the one who always supported me and was too much happy for me. I came for doing MBA and he went to onsite for earning some money.
But since the day he went onsite, he wants to live his life and just explore different places. He just think about him not for our future life. He even say that after marriage we should live our life the way we want to and if we need any help we will be there. I feel as if he thinks that marriage also the two remains two whereas for me its the bind which makes two person as one.
For achieving me he went to my family n cried a lot in front of them so as to get me and made lots of promises to my family that he will renovate his house and to me that we will travel and he wil keep me happy.
But now even when I cry he doesnot bother anymore. He leaves me alone and the whole night I will be crying but he wil sleep.
When I ask him to save some money to fulfill the promises that he made then he says if I wud nt hv cm to onsite then too i wud nt have fulfilled those then why are u worried for it.
Now I am worried about will he be able to handle me or not.
After 1 day he console me and I am not able to leave him . Whenever I leave him after 4 or 5 days whenever I am disturbed its only he that comes into my mind and I call him and talk to him.
But again after some days we went into some fight. Then same thing resolves. He is adamant that he wants to marry me although he also gets irritated from me sometimes and same happens with me too. But I am always confused. I make mind but something happens that we are not able to separate or mingle with each other.
I want to come to some decision as this disturbs my parents and me too.
I am not able to study now because of not being able to make this decision. That too doesnot bother him.
Whenever I say something to him,he thinks that I am putting restrictions on him but never thinks that I am thinking about our future.
Also I sometimes feel that I want some knowledgeable person also with good english and knowledge and he doesnot fulfill any but then too when I leave him I am not able to stay to my decision.
Now he has lost his patience and he is fine even if I leave him
Please help what to do.
 
jespah
 
  4  
Reply Fri 30 Oct, 2015 05:14 pm
@love2,
You fight, he isn't working to fulfill the promises he made to you and your family, he doesn't comfort you when you're upset, and he's apparently saying he can take or leave you.

So, why are you allowing yourself to be treated this way?
0 Replies
 
FOUND SOUL
 
  3  
Reply Sat 31 Oct, 2015 03:32 pm
@love2,
If you want my honest opinion, you are very clingy and needy.

I see that he is trying to tell you that you two can be individual people, living your own lives, yet as one, married. That you see, if you cry, if you yell, if you demand, if you ask, he must come to all of those immediately and he must just live for you, not live a life.

This is not a marriage and this is not good for you either, you need to be individual people "coming together" but leading lives that are both separate and together.

I do think that he loves you but he's trying to give you a very strong message that you are not listening to.

I don't know if he can "handle you" as you want a knight. You should want a man, who loves you.
love2
 
  1  
Reply Wed 4 Nov, 2015 03:02 pm
@FOUND SOUL,
I want honest reviews only
Thanks for your reply.
But I am not hindering him from living his life but just want him to leave his casual attitude and think something about our future too.
Is this wrong that a gal demands this much from a boy.
If I am accepting everything and leaving my home then can't a girl expect some responsibility from a boy end.
Will I be responsible for everything?
FOUND SOUL
 
  1  
Reply Thu 5 Nov, 2015 01:45 am
@love2,
Not really but if you think that he has a casual attitude and you are ready for marriage, do you perhaps think he's not mature enough to handle marriage? Or if not, that you two are not on the same wavelength and may not ever be?

I think no one should demand anything of anyone. We belong to ourselves, in that, we "marry" that being we become perfect partners for each other, as we are on the same wave length in life, same goals, same values, same beliefs.

I think you should not leave your home. I think that you should ascertain if he is ready for marriage and commitment and you can work together in harmony, if not, hold of for another year or two.

Even if it doesn't work out at least you didn't marry and end up Divorced or if you don't believe in that, end up extremely un-happy with life.

love2
 
  1  
Reply Tue 23 Feb, 2016 03:08 pm
@FOUND SOUL,
Please tell me that In a marriage everyone has some choices like wise I always thought of having an intelligent guy, caring and loving guy.

All other issues are resolved between us. But is it wrong on my part to think and want this much.

In arrange marriage, I can get an intelligent guy but don't know whether I will be able to forget my love who care for me so much and loved me like anything and made a lot of sacrifices for me.
FOUND SOUL
 
  1  
Reply Tue 23 Feb, 2016 03:16 pm
@love2,
He also wants to be himself, travel. Is that not a fair thing? Should we "make" people do only what we want?

In an arranged marriage you may not have love.

I think he sees a future and later down the track, to spend on his house but now sees "with love" two people can have their own identity" yet, still be one.
0 Replies
 
Osibos
 
  1  
Reply Wed 19 Feb, 2020 10:08 pm
@love2,
Did you change yourself for him? In that case, it is best to remain true to yourself and not play to his desires.

Whoever he is then you two need to make an effort on compassionately accepting one another, or you two will be unhappy. And that's all there is to it.

Compassion is a term used to describe the removal of pain from someone.
izzythepush
 
  1  
Reply Thu 20 Feb, 2020 04:02 am
@Osibos,
This thread's even older than the last one. Your advice is years too late.
bobsal u1553115
 
  2  
Reply Thu 20 Feb, 2020 01:17 pm
@izzythepush,
Newby trying to get into the swing?
izzythepush
 
  2  
Reply Thu 20 Feb, 2020 01:29 pm
@bobsal u1553115,
And some.
Osibos
 
  1  
Reply Sun 23 Feb, 2020 12:24 pm
@izzythepush,
Timing is not really important.
izzythepush
 
  2  
Reply Sun 23 Feb, 2020 03:28 pm
@Osibos,
I suppose that's one thing bollocks has over comedy.
Osibos
 
  1  
Reply Sun 23 Feb, 2020 04:16 pm
@izzythepush,
Find your own timing.
0 Replies
 
bobsal u1553115
 
  2  
Reply Mon 24 Feb, 2020 04:30 pm
@izzythepush,
Yeah Izzy: find your own timing.
izzythepush
 
  3  
Reply Tue 25 Feb, 2020 01:44 am
@bobsal u1553115,
I think I saw some down the back of the sofa once.
bobsal u1553115
 
  3  
Reply Tue 25 Feb, 2020 12:35 pm
@izzythepush,
That was crisps, I et 'em already.
izzythepush
 
  1  
Reply Tue 25 Feb, 2020 01:12 pm
@bobsal u1553115,
Which reminds me of when Kevin Bridges was on a quiz show and he said the answer was thyme, like the crisps.
izzythepush
 
  2  
Reply Tue 25 Feb, 2020 01:30 pm
@izzythepush,
Here's Kevin Bridges on problems abroad. You may need subtitles.

bobsal u1553115
 
  1  
Reply Wed 26 Feb, 2020 01:23 pm
@izzythepush,
That would presume some ability to read on my part.
 

Related Topics

 
  1. Forums
  2. » A boy love me a lot and I am confused about him
Copyright © 2020 MadLab, LLC :: Terms of Service :: Privacy Policy :: Page generated in 0.03 seconds on 07/05/2020 at 04:16:01