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Friend is into something "more" (bi)

 
 
Reply Fri 25 Sep, 2015 05:20 pm
this topic is pretty weird so I guess people here will associate...

I am 100% straight. I met one guy who is professional Thaibox and K1 fighter. He is one of the best I know, more over quite OK guy. I asked him to teach me, on the other hand I help him with sponsors as I am business guy and always wanted to represent professional fighter like him. Which is great.

But... guy is probably bisexual. He has girlfriends but recently started to act... well odd. I don't want to describe how exactly let's just say I feel pressure when around him. More over I really don't want other guys from gym to think of me something wrong. I am pure straight. really!

The biggest problem is I have absolutely no idea what to do!! Word of men-to-men romance simply does not exist for me and in such situations I have no clue. So far I simply ignored this and acted nice... for apparent reasons. But guy explains my attitude probably wrong and I can feel increasing pressure.

I want to keep up our professional relationship, maybe having a good friend but I don't want to make embarrassing situations or giving him a wrong lead.

One positive fact: he is quite good lucking and cool! Yeah, having him around chicks would help me a lot! Very Happy

What to do?
 
View best answer, chosen by Vernon of Prague
chai2
 
  1  
Reply Fri 25 Sep, 2015 05:40 pm
Tell him "boy I hate fags" and leave it at that. Rolling Eyes

Or, just admit you have the hots for him, make a pass, and feel really stupid when he rejects you.
Vernon of Prague
 
  2  
Reply Fri 25 Sep, 2015 05:42 pm
@chai2,
is this some kind of troll?

he is no fag. I have no hot for him.

You nick is familiar but I cannot recall if you are on general shitlist...
0 Replies
 
ehBeth
  Selected Answer
 
  3  
Reply Fri 25 Sep, 2015 05:48 pm
@Vernon of Prague,
Vernon of Prague wrote:
I want to keep up our professional relationship


focus on this piece

stay professional around him (and that means not using him as a chick magnet)

think of you would behave with any colleague - and behave that way with him

if he does step over the line, tell him that your relationship with him is for business purposes - that you want to be a great manager for him
Vernon of Prague
 
  1  
Reply Fri 25 Sep, 2015 05:56 pm
@ehBeth,
Quote:
if he does step over the line, tell him that your relationship with him is for business purposes - that you want to be a great manager for him


You are right. Also, I see him as cool guy, I am always happy for good friends. But I am not sure if I will have courage to tell him something like that... Maybe he gets upset? I don't want to loose a friend... As I said I have really no clue what to do in such situations... I wish somebody could solve this for me Smile
ehBeth
 
  3  
Reply Fri 25 Sep, 2015 05:58 pm
@Vernon of Prague,
If you're a wise businessman, you'll be able to tell him.

If you can't handle that, you're probably not ready to be a manager in any case.

You have to give it a try.
Vernon of Prague
 
  2  
Reply Fri 25 Sep, 2015 06:12 pm
@ehBeth,
Quote:
If you're a wise businessman, you'll be able to tell him.

If you can't handle that, you're probably not ready to be a manager in any case.


hahaha! That is why I struggle! Smile You never take personal issues to the business, that's why I do it with ease. But this is personal. Very personal. And I have zero experience with that.

I really have to reconsider if I am strong enough about this. The fact is.... a) I like him because of his personality and his skill and b) Let us be straight - liking somebody is rarely these days... particularly for me Smile I do enjoy his attention a bit but I wish he understood it will never go beyond enjoyment of his attention... Does it make sense?

After all this is my fault. I have shown a lot of interest in him and made a lot of effort. I can clearly understand why he thinks wrong about it. If I were him I would feel disappointed, maybe even hurt. That is why I feel no courage...


eh... this topic is extremely hard to express for me. I hope it makes some sense...
Vernon of Prague
 
  1  
Reply Sat 26 Sep, 2015 05:01 am
@Vernon of Prague,
thinking of it yeah... I have no choice. I just hope shortly after I tell him lightings struck me and I will have complete amnesia Smile
0 Replies
 
PUNKEY
 
  2  
Reply Sat 26 Sep, 2015 06:04 am
How is it that he does not know your sexual preference? Have you never talked about it?

Are you perhaps teasing him? Giving him mixed messages?

You need to be more assertive about yourself. I don't know how you are going to make it in a management capacity if you aren't able to set boundaries.
Vernon of Prague
 
  0  
Reply Mon 28 Sep, 2015 03:20 pm
@PUNKEY,
I talked with him (joked) about group of chicks the first day I met him when we waited at metro station. I think I was pretty clear but...

Yes, there is no wonder he is confused. As I mentioned, I studied economy of sport and both him and gym where he trains at are very good so I took as some kind of honour to help them with finances. But they are not the kind of people used to such thinking... I believe when I was interested in him and his sport career he suspected me there is something more going on and this is his explanation.


Maybe this is a complete bullshit but I have feeling he actually might like me! Something tells me... recently he invited me to his match and so on... he spends time with me when he could spend time with other pals that he know much longer... Most weird part about is that I cannot get used to such idea. I mean after all these years of solitude when average chicks cannot find 10 minutes after work to spend with me over cup of tea I cannot understand how could somebody see more in me then "I am currently horny and you are first person to be around" Very Happy He is better looking, much more popular and cool and he could chose from many people. I can see even reactions of our reception girl - she could **** herself from him Very Happy
wmwcjr
 
  1  
Reply Wed 30 Sep, 2015 10:07 pm
@Vernon of Prague,
Vernon of Prague wrote:
group of chicks


http://leesfeedstore.com/communities/5/000/001/028/345//images/2775790.png
0 Replies
 
Vernon of Prague
 
  0  
Reply Tue 6 Oct, 2015 03:20 pm
well the conclusion is that problem (probbably) solves itself.

I cannot say what is in him mind but recently he started to act more aloof or better to say aggressive. During regular trainings he screams at me like to an animal and today as we had private one he beat me like a dog. Very Happy My face is whole red, I am curious what my colleagues gonna say of that. I asked him for "a bit harder fight" but I can see there was some internal aggression involved, not just practicing. When I was defenceless at the corner he continued to beat me until he knocked me out.


well I wanted to have good friend with interesting skill but then, last few months I alone am acting grumpy and not really outgoing so there is no wonder people slowly make distance from me.

on the other hand... I liked his attention. Maybe because it's because I crave for it myself...
0 Replies
 
 

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