Choosing lifestyle instead of a well paid job ..

I was never a high-paid success story, but I've always opted for the low-stress, alternative work style. Right now I'm a nanny, I've done landscaping, computer tech (part-time in college), food industry, bartending, etc....

My biggest concerns for this lifestyle are:
I have a very unsubstantial retirement plan
I have no benefits (pay for my own health care - ouch!)
I receive low pay

that idea certainly has merit. wouldn't work for me though, i'm a self confessed workaholic. it's sunday here, and of course in oz as well, and i'm at work.

the main reason i need to keep my current status is the school system here on guam. it's a disaster. i have my oldest daughter (5) in a private school and my youngest daughter (4) in a daycare which stresses education as a fun activity. both cost $$'s, but well worth the cost.

littlek

Interesting that you obviously chose not to be a wage slave years ago ... Was there a particular reason for this? Yeah, thoughts of retirement can be a real worry when you live like this, but I figure that I don't want to spend most of my life working like a crazy person to retire (exhausted!) "comfortably". And the thought of being old & sick & broke isn't exactly appealing, is it?

pueo

Are you REQUIRED to be at work on Sunday, or have you chosen to be there? (I can't BELIEVE the enormous number of hours some people are expected to do as a "normal" part of their job! What ever happened to the 40 hour week??? )
But at least you are not working long hours to buy thing, commodities ... I can understand your position.
Like you, I USED to be a workaholic ... Thrived on it! BUT, I think I just burned out as the hours & demands got more & more pressing over time. At that stage I felt if I didn't get off the treadmill something would go BOOM! And now I survive on contract positions. Lots of pluses in regard to lifestyle/sanity, but it can be quite stressful making the $$$$ stretch between jobs.
And living a simpler life to accomodate the reduction of $$$ has has its nice moments, too. Time to smell the roses & all that ...

I'm not exactly sure why I chose this path at the outset. Even as a kid I didn't have a drive to "be a <blank> when I grow up". It's odd that I work for two sets of parents who have opted to work hard and pay me to take care of their kid.

Being old, sick, alone and broke seems even less appealing. Down right scares the pants off me.

Pueo - so, your wife works as well?

Very interesting!

I had a pretty high-powered and high-paid job, and quit to be a full-time mom. That job (full-time mom-hood) certainly carries its own stressors, but I'm really really REALLY happy that I chose to do it, and more than that, that I chose to save a great big chunk of my high-paid salary so that I could do it. (It wasn't actually that high of pay, but for the field I was in it was way up there.)



It's gone really well thus far.



The adjustment to a smaller income was definitely difficult -- our income was chopped in half, plus kid expenses, and while I saved a chunk I wanted to leave that in savings if at all possible. We've taken a long time to adjust. I came across something that I bought a couple of years ago, right after I quit, and remembered thinking it was cheap for $100. Now, about the only thing I would consider cheap at $100 is a pretty decent car.

The second part doesn't really apply, though it does, too -- confusing. When I was working (and, yes, 60-hour weeks), I remember seeing someone with a fresh tan/ burn at my health club, and thinking incredulously, "But, it's Tuesday!" I just couldn't get my mind around people having time to laze around in the sun on a weekday.

So, all last summer I went to our local beach and lazed around in the sun. Well, "laze" might be stretching it -- I spent the whole time dashing around after a very energetic toddler. That's fun and fulfilling as can be, but also exhausting as can be. And I couldn't so much as open a magazine, 'cause who knows what mischief she could get in during the 30 seconds my eyes were off of her.

I have hardly any time completely to myself -- in that way, the old working days seem full of incredible luxury. I'd come home and read the ENTIRE paper with NO interruptions!! What a concept!! However, I can just decide that we're going to the Shedd (acquarium) any time and go. Period. That's a different kind of freedom, and I like it.

I used to choose my hours (last year I decided not to work on Mondays and not to work before noon).

I used to work 3-5 hours a day and then work at home when I felt like it.

I chose to end this good life because while I was manking good money in Brazil the exchange rate was making this money worth less and less outside of Brazil. The exchange rate was deteriorating without inflation to raise my rates.

Since I'd not wanted to live in Brazil forever I decided to leave.

right now, i'm choosing to be here. in the aftermath of the typhoon i'm trying to get everything "back on line." i usually stop by on sunday's to check phone messages, etc. i'm starting to feel the strain myself. kind of pissing me off, because before in my thirties, i could work endless hours without any strain at all. there is something to the affect of age after a while, being over 40 sucks.

littlek, yes she does. she's an accountant.

The last time I had a full time job with pay was some 20 or so years ago.
It was just a retail position. I never did anything with my degree in Physical Education, instead I got married, got pregnant and decided to be a stay at home mom for the last 18 years.
It's been a struggle money wise, but I learned how to budget money pretty well, learned how to make money stretch, was able to pass on my expertise to my children.
I figured I had much more to offer my children, then what the working world had to offer me financially.
The negative side is that when and if I decide to go back into the working world again, I'll be so rusty and so set in my ways that it will probably be very hard for me to adjust.
I'd rather do without having more things material wise, then have to wonder if choosing to work was too much sacrifice to my childrens well being.
I can always get a paying job once the kids leave the nest, but I wouldn't get the chance to raise my children again if I learned they resented me for spending more time at work, then with them.
For me, my children are my number one priority.
My decision to be a stay at home mom was decided for me by my own resentment of my mother being a career woman.
Besides that, I believe that I'm good at it.

I find the notion of a "hidden movement" of people who have made these choices ( as individuals) very interesting. And the fact that in Oz they appear to be unaware that they are a significant sub-group, due to their isolation ... Now if they ever get organised in a serious way it could have a big impact on society ... Not the least politically. (Makes me feel optimistic! )

sozobe & dlk33

You both sound very satisfied with your choices & I'm certain your children will see the benefits. I find it very sad when children less than a year old, even, are left at creches all day ... Though I can understand why some parents might feel that they have no choice, if they want to make ends meet. Any woman I know who has had to do this has always felt guilty, or sad at missing out on such important years of her child.
Why can't employers be more flexible about workers with family responsibilities?

Craven

You must be very versatile & highly employable to be able to swap countries & jobs so easily!

Pueo

Maybe it's not the age thing so much but an accumulation of many years of working long hours, under pressure. Hope you can manage a holiday soon!

My best case senario:

To be able to pace myself (some pat-time work here, some time off there, a little full-time work from time to time ..) to be still working when I'm in my 70s (longer?). This strikes me as a saner option than working at a manic rate till say, 60, 65 ..) then retiring & doing no work at all.
The thought of stopping work altogether is quite difficult to contemplate ...

I started caring for these kids when they were very young. One was just under 6 months. I sat with her part-time - her mother worked 3 days a week and then went full time over the course of 1.5 years. The other kid I started to care for when she was just under 2 months old. Her mom worked a 4 day week.

MsOlga - I agree with your work ethic. I'd like to work in a variety of fields, start myself an IRA, work in some capacity into my 70s.

I've been a workaholic since as far back as I can remember. Either in the work place or at home I always need to be doing something. I use to work an average of 60 hours a week for several years and I got burnt out pretty fast. A few years back I made a huge move to Canada where I decided to home school my son and as much of a challenge it's been, I never had any regrets. I'm on a tight budget at all times, but I don't mind at all since I've grown to be happy with the simple things in life and enjoy spending time with my son. If I had the choice I'd never go back out to work again. I have had many occupations in my life such as working in a bank, large payroll company, waitressing, bartender, store clerk, construction, bookkeeper, owning my own taxi, etc... When I do go back into the work place, I would like to have my own business again. I am looking at a small restaurant right now.

gezzy

What a creative & adaptable person you sound! Landing on your feet through changes & more changes ... Good for you!
Was the move to Canada for slowing down, lifestyle reasons?
And aren't you glad that you're not working 60 hours a week anymore ... No wonder you felt burnt out!

littlek

Sounds like you might know these children better than their parents! You're probably more of a beloved aunt than a nanny to them.

Yep, let's keep working at a sane pace till we're old & doddery! Seems a pretty reasonable option to me! Let's just hope there are innovative & intelligent employers out there who'll also see the sense in this ... Would suit everyone, really. And I don't believe that "retiring" at say, age 60 or 65 is good use of "human resources" (to use the jargon) ... Especially when these people are still alert, active & want to continue participating in work & society.

msolga
Thanks and yes, my move to Canada was to slow things down. I am extremely happy with our move. I was running strictly in burnout mode for way too long and my blood pressure was going right through the roof. Being a single mom on top of the long hours was very difficult as well. Coming here was a breath of fresh air to say the least. I was so stressed when we got here that it actually took me a good 2 years to settle down and I've never been so relaxed in my life :-D

gezzy

I fully understand the stress & moving thing! I moved to this little place a little over a month ago (In the same city, even ... & about only 7 minutes up the road) & have found myself so ZAPPED by the experience! But it was also the circumstances of the shift that contributed, as well.

But what a brave & positive move you made! To make that kind of change (work, country ..) while a single mother, as well ... Gosh, congratulations, I'm very impressed! And pleased that it all worked out so well for you.