The Insult Chain Game

That allegedly "allergy" is due to heroin withdrawal, you drugged-out mess. And don't expect your doctor to give you prescription pain meds to help you get high either--he's already under investigation for writing too many scripts for those drugs. Try getting clean and sober--if you can even remember what that's like.

I bumped into some old friends I hadn't seen in a while yesterday, and they gave me some information I've needed.

bump

Those old friends were the health department Swat Team. How many times do you have to be told its wipe from the front then the back. If your "friends" get anymore complaints from your neighbors, who don't share your enthusiasm for open sewer smells wafting into their yards, plan to expect the fire department to hose you down, you walking stench soaked old rummy.

I think it's my turn to arrange flowers for our church services. I've been told my arrangements are jaw dropping.

This thread must not stay stagnant ........................

Glitter seriously, you wouldn't know how to re-arrange your knickers for a jaw drop.

Stagnant? Isn't that the way people refer to your drug addled life you pill-popping hussy?


My doctor told me the other day she is getting married and leaving the country. She introduced me to the replacement; but, I'm still concerned on how I'll survive this change.

Sheez don't you know she lied, just to get away from your constant whining?

Going to put loud music on if I 'must' drive 1.5hrs just to get to a photo shoot!

That loud music won't drown out the sirens of the police cars chasing you, and the 'photo shoot' you're going to involves having your mug shot taken, you dishonest crook.

I can't believe it's Autumn already, the Summer just flew by.

That's because you were in a self-induced coma from your heroin habit, you drugged out useless piece of flotsam.

I just booked a ticket to the Mayan Riviera for January so I can escape this God-forsaken winter.

Obviously, prostitution, oops I mean your 'escort service', has been keeping you busy and paying you well--we haven't seen you around here in ages. --but you're not going to the Mayan Rivera next January to escape the cold, you phony, you want to offer your 'services' to all those sex starved affluent tourists, the ones who are so desperate and deprived by their wives, they'll gladly shell out some cash even for someone as haggard as you are.

I have to purchase a house-warming gift and I'm stumped about what to get.

I'm sure you are as there's not much you can get when you're a worthless bum without a cent to your name. Just do what you usually do and grab a bottle from the liquor store, shove it in your coat pocket and make a dash for the door.


I thought the hot humid weather was done with but today seems like a cloud is hugging the ground and soaking everything.

Duh...that's because you were drunk, and passed out on the lawn in front of a building, and the sprinkler system went off, making you soaking wet, you sot. People passing by shook their heads and tried to ignore you, small children pointed and laughed, a dog peed on your leg, and a frantic doorman finally roused you, and gave you a stern warning never to come near there again. If you go home, and change into dry clothes, things will stop feeling so humid and soaking, you dumb dipso.

My computer is behaving very oddly--Internet Explorer keeps disappearing.

Here's a novel idea you drunken bill dodger, try paying your cable bill once or twice a year. All the neighbors are on to you and you can't tap their water, cable or electricity anymore because they are sick of supporting your unemployed, welfare cheating boozy life style.

It's a lovely day, I think I'll have Jeeves bring the car around so I can treat the noble beasts to a few carrots at my Davidsonville Horse farm.

Nobody ******* cares. Your faux pas insults are better than your factual insults.

I am going to let go of all my philosophy, psychology and ontology practices to seek out a normal life like everyone else.

Dear one eye, you don't seem to understand the tenor of this thread. Feel free to fling around your 'inscrutable' tidbits of philosophy, mysticism or whatever it is you do on other threads, for that matter, no one will deny you entrance on this thread. But if you wish to fully participate and engage the others, its important to possess a sense of humor and an understanding of the game the rest of us are playing. I'm sure you already know this, but the goal is to see how outrageously you can insult the poster above (hopefully it will make the target laugh) then post something about yourself, also to set yourself up for retaliatory insults (hopefully something so funny you will enjoy the insult directed to you).

Let me try this one other way, if you want to be ignored just continue as you did, but I'm certain if you type:
You stink!

Oh yeah, well you stink more! People will skip over and not engage. I'm assuming you misunderstood the intent of this particular thread. If I'm wrong, and you do understand, well, you kinda stink at this.

I decided to reprint my post for continuity, I hope all you crusty whiners understand.

Sigh, people take me seriously when they shouldn't; then don't take me seriously when they should.

It's very funny.

What a pity, well at least you're amused. Enjoy.

You'll be clearly violating the restraining orders that both Jeeves (not your chauffeur but a neighborhood baker) and the real owners of Davidsonville Horse farm have placed on you since you tried to feed the horses (and Jeeves) LSD laced carrots.

I'm going to grab dinner at Umami Burger after work and then head on over to High Line Park.
http://www.thehighline.org/

Dude, they have installed video cameras and hired more security since the last time you grabbed dinner and skipped out on the bill. Wait until you get to 'High Line Park" (sic) and pig out on the free donuts and coffee.

Well, my caterer is here to help me with the watercress sandwiches and set up for my bridge club. I'm expecting them at 6 PM.

Yeah the only Bridge Club you belong to is the club of fellow societal leeches living in plywood huts under the bridge because you're too lazy to get jobs and thereby pay rent.
Watercress sandwiches? Ha! More like water soaked remnants of the dinner bits you scrounged out of the dumpster behind Chez Francois's place during the rainstorm.

This weekend I'm planning to watch the boats as they sail along the river as me and my friends enjoy our barbecue.