That's what you're telling your partner, but we know those "nurses" you've been seeing are twin hookers, and the techniques they use sure aren't meant to treat you for a shoulder infection, you lying cheater.
So, you got yourself evicted again and you're living outdoors behind the dump. Hope the little campfire keeps your tootsies warm, but be careful not to burn up the cardboard box, you'll need it to sleep in.
There would have been no need to if you hadn't been so drunk at the last party you attended and you spilt food and drink everywhere including up on yourself you sot.
My partner and I will be going to the movies tonight.