Since it always gives you gas we'll alert your neighbors to keep their distance.
Duty calls me now.
Still calling it "duty"? Don't forget to wash your hands.
Whose vegetable soup is this?
As alway's, I don't have a clue as to what you are talking about.
I'm going to take my neice sledding today.
Don't you have other uses for those old tin trays - as a roof perhaps?
A new Spanish student arrived at our School of English today.
Then he read that last sentence of yours and fled in shock and dismay.
I get my stitches out tomorrow.
Hope our laughter doesn't keep you in stitches.
One of my oldest friends has just had 2 electrodes sunk into his brain.
You should stop doing those cruel experiments; you might kill someone.
Coincidentally, there's a Frankenberry bobblehead in my office.
Too... many... jokes! Must... not... violate... TOS!
Judging from the eyes, she can bobble her head in my office any time.
Don't hold your breath waiting.
I'm having a great day.
Still on the Frosted Flakes diet?
I believe in recycling.
That would explain those three ex-husbands in the compost heap (and that would be #4 in the woodchipper?).
Should I sit for a formal portrait?
Sure! I overheard one of your family members saying they'd love to hang you.
Why shouldn't I go running in the rain?
You should, just wear clothes this time.
I'm getting hungry.
When are you not hungry, your stomach is a bottomless pit.
I just got my taillights fixed.
And now you can teach yourself how to use the blinkers!
It's dark right now.
Try opening your eyes.
I just put a chicken in the oven.
Hansel still not fat enough?
I am looking forward to a pleasant Thanksgiving dinner.
I guess that means you'll be dining alone, since the family always argues about who'll be unfortunate enough to sit next to you.
My dog won't eat.
He knows he'll just throw it all up again when he looks at you.
I saw a Russian movie tonight, Sisters - pretty good.
Alone in the dark
Watching depressing movies
Your life is so full.
I have haikus on the brain.
