It's about time you left, you hairy bastard.
I am counseling troubled teenagers this morning.
Yeah..."counseling" is how all the molestors describe it.
There are no rules.
.... said the complete sociopath.
I drank 8 year old coffee this a.m.
It's about time---you finally swept up the coffee grounds you spilled all over your kitchen floor.
It's raining cats and dogs.
If you'd stop sleeping under park benches, dogs would stop peeing on you.
My morning coffee was actually taken from a vaccum pack that had been stored in my cupboard for 8 years following a trip to Jamaica ... not as bad as I thought it might be, but not exactly "fresh."
You re-use tea bags and take apart two-ply toilet paper to make it last longer, don't you, you miser?!
I'm up to my eyes in paperwork!
Been working on your own appeal in the prison law library? You know that means you have a fool for a client.
I had an easy day at work.
They got your vein on the first stick?
I'm going to court soon.
Gene Simmons and I have one thing in common. Your soon to be ex-wife.
I'm eating Chinese fast food.
Also known as mice turds and rice.
I'm considering going back to school.
I don't think they will let someone your age attend 7th grade.
I almost forgot to set myself up.
You're such an easy mark you don't have to bother. But, if you laid off the gin, your memory would be better.
I'm going to change my clothes now,
Why don't you try some adult diapers?
I prefer Splenda to saccharine.
Your body wouldn't recognize a bonafide food source if it fell over one.
Pizza with White Zinfandel...heaven.
Maybe if you're 13.
Stromboli heart attack pizza with a nasty old vines red zinfandel works for me.
And anything that gave you a heart-attack would work for us.
I don't believe in reincarnation.
If you come back, I'm leaving.
If my air conditioner compressor gives out, I'm a goner.
So what do you do, give free oral to the power company meter reader once a month?
It's hot here today too.
It's probably that composting action happening in your filthy underwear again.
People, people who need people are the lamest people.
You're the lamest people.
I'm feeling tired.
