Shouldn't you learn how to read one first?
I love the summertime.
Yes, your out of your cave for the summer months
I enjoy a long winter night with a woman.
Do the women charge you more for those longer nights?
I feel thirsty.
You will be ok, it's only rabies!
Think I'll water the lawn.
Urinating in public is illegal, as the police keep letting you know.
I received two presents in the mail yesterday.
I know it makes you feel loved but you must stop sending presents to yourself.
I must cut the grass tomorrow.
Do you own a scythe, or do you rent one for the rare occasions when you cut your grass?
I've got to get dinner started.
Food eh?....See the welfare cheque has arrived then.
Time for bed, methinks.
Don't you mean you've got to get the car started to get to the take away, the last time you cooked dinner was when Armstrong landed on the moon.
I think I'll read a little before going to sleep.
Still reading Playboy under the bedcovers with a flashlight?
I think I'll make some chicken marsala.
You've got to stop making the poor chicken do those strange things!
I went to the beach today.
I hope you didn't strip off and frighten the kiddies away.
I'm having a 'tidy the house' day.
What, did you fire the maid?
today is Independence Day, however, we're all so sappy for company, it's nothing but a ridiculous charade. Happy fourth everybody........
from Lola
Can't really insult Independance Day have good one everyone over the pond and be careful of the fireworks.
I've just found something dead in my kitchen.
One of last nights dinner guests, perchance?
The sun is shining here.
Your cell must be facing south to catch the sun at this time of day.
I've got to check my stocks and shares.
Going to the stockyard where you have a share in the sh*t?
There's a man on my roof mending it.
Another escape blocked.
Time for lunch.
The zookeepers really keep you on a schedule, don't they? Too bad they can't keep you on a diet.
I don't think I'll get to see fireworks today.
You shouldn't have put your eyes out upon seeing your reflection! It's not THAT bad! <puking > Now isn't it difficult to use that Braille computer?
I fear the rain may cancel the fireworks here as well.
