Of course you will be familiar with the term.
Did they whitewash a load of sins when you were young, and just call you slow?
Certainly not, thank you very much.
Did anyone go swimming this past weekend?
My nephew got drunk on Saturday night and fell in the canal.
Would you call that swimming?
They certainly did whitewash a lot of my sins. When you consider how big the pile was and how little they charged you have to be grateful.They did it so good that they vanished. The sins I mean. I've atoned for most of them.
But I wasn't all that slow. I could be nippy when I wanted to be which wasn't often.
You won't have any sins to atone for though will you Mr Pinnacle of Human Evolution?
Well, yes, I would... unintentional, perhaps, but swimming nonetheless. Was he able to get himself out okay?
Who cares whether he got out. He was drunk driving wasn't he. We are all safer with him in the canal.
Aren't we?
Mr Pinnacle of Human Evolution, I dare say there would be hosts of the fair sex endearing me with that title.
He wasn't driving either primary conclusion little tit aren't you?
As it was Mame, (he is my late elder sisters second lad, is like me in most of his ways too) he was doing a bit of showing off in Manchester whilst under the influence, walking along the bridge parapet in his boxer shorts, when he fell into the murky waters of the Bridgewater Canal. It's funny, when I was a kid, I used to swim in there and the Manchester Ship Canal, we never ailed anything either!
He got out ok, apparently one of his mates took some phone camera pics and he is going to download them, if I can, I will get one and post it to you.
Don't you think it's great to just do it?
I don't know what you mean by "it". I might try to answer if I was enlightened.
Will you enlighten me?
I don't know your of sound enough mind or calibre to be enlightened Spendi!
That level of responsibility falling on my shoulders would be an onus indeed.
Have you ever thought of joining the Buffalo's or Free Mason fraternity, I am lead to believe that such organisations enlighten numerous as an act of charity, did you not know that?
No. I didn't know that. I know you're as pissed as a fart though.
You're not like that sober are you?
I hardly touch the stuff Spendi, I have always been under the impression it drove people mad.
You do understand that, don't you? Idiot.
Idiots don't understand sophisticated ideas.
Are you barmy or what?
No, I am not.
Which sport do you prefer to watch?
Nude lady mud wrestling as long as the contestants are not too much overweight.
Why is it not on more?
I guess not or else you would know. Wouldn't you?
I don't care.
Why should I?
Why does he only want to watch if they're not too fat? Wouldn't chubby ladies mud-wrestling be just as entertaining
The sheer unsightliness renders it aesthetically distasteful to people of refined disposition. But "chubby" is OK.
Are you overweight?
Not overweight. But good enough to kick the eveteasers in the butt.
What's your fave part-time hobby?
