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Ex-boyfriend or new guy?

 
 
Reply Mon 20 Apr, 2015 10:53 pm
Me and my ex-boyfriend has been together in about 1 and a half year and we have been on and of because I always have been unsure about my feelings and afraid to commit to him even tough I always knew I could trust him. But then I suddendly got pregnant and unsure what to do, but he said he would support me and I was sure he would. But then he started getting really distant and didn't contact me for 2 weeks, and I got really mad and broke up with him because he didn't support me at all trough my abortion, and it has been really hard and I have been really depressed.. And in the middle of all this mess I got to know a new guy who is really nice and a lot like me. I went on a date with him just to get out and try to feel a little better. And we ended up drinking a lot of whine and I had really fun and we ended up making out, nothing more. But I felt terrible about it because I realized I only tought about my ex and I felt like I was cheating even tough we had broken up already. Me an my ex was starting to get friendly with eachother again and he explained that he was a jerk and only tought I needed time to think about what I wanted to do. And I know that both are intrested in being in a relationship with me, but I don't know if I should move forward and try someone new, or go back with my boyfriend? What do you think is the best? I am really confused:/
 
jespah
 
  3  
Reply Tue 21 Apr, 2015 05:10 am
@lazysloth,
If it's only been recently since your abortion (as in, less than 4 months or so), then you might still have pregnancy hormones in you and they can affect your judgment in the sense that you'd want to settle and nest.

So understand that you might be affected in a chemical way.

There is nothing wrong, and there is no shame whatsoever, in being with neither of them for the time being. In fact, I suspect it would be good for you. Clear your head and depend on yourself for your own happiness and entertainment. Cultivate some inner resources.

And then maybe think of what it means when someone isn't supportive during a fairly big medical procedure.
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PUNKEY
 
  1  
Reply Tue 21 Apr, 2015 06:44 am
Your BF was not there just at the time you needed him the most.

Think about that.

In the meantime, be sure that you are protected against unwanted pregnancy and - how about taking a break from guys for a while to get your head together?

It sounds like neither of these guys can give you what you need right now. No need to make a choice between a let down and the unknown.
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FOUND SOUL
 
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Reply Tue 21 Apr, 2015 04:26 pm
@lazysloth,
Quote:
he explained that he was a jerk and only tought I needed time to think about what I wanted to do


He wasn't there for you in one of the most toughest decisions in life.

More so though, you two have been on and off and on and off and on and off, so that tells me that he's not the right one for you, you would know and you would be able to commit.

Take some healing time out just for you and look at it later with a fresh approach.
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JadeChin
 
  1  
Reply Tue 21 Apr, 2015 08:37 pm
@lazysloth,

Your Ex should be there for you, in fact he's irresponsible letting you go through it by yourself. His flawed character was revealed.

Hey sister, do give yourself some time to think through carefully if you wish to go back to your Ex. Remember you can't change a man, unless he decided to do so.
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