girl i have been seeing told me "she needs space bc things have gotten too intense and is scared"

I'll reduce it simply to this advice: she got a little scared of either of the following:
your feelings
her feelings
or both.

Be more casual. Be patient and wait it out.

Thanks for the reply. Keep waiting for her to text me? We text but it is not the same fun, loving, flirty texts. Mostly just random boring stuff. She seems just fine and Im suffering. I just want it to work out in the end bc she said we have something special but I cant get that feeling from her anymire

Boy am I the wrong person to ask about texting. My advice about texting is don't text at all if what you desire is more intimacy in a relationship. Texting trivializes a relationship.

I personally feel it's precisely what distances people in young relationships. I see texting's usefulness when you need to quickly confirm a get-together or the time for a date. But if you want to chat, that's what a phone call is about.

Use patience and restraint if you can handle NOT trying to pin her down as to where and what she wants from the relationship. Have a fun time and keep it causal - if you can! Respect her wishes as she's made them clear to you.

In her own timeframe, if she's ready for a deeper commitment to happen, she'll get there. If she can't, then you'll both know it. Pressuring will only make matters worse.

It means you got dumped.

I can but its drives me crazy wondering every day how long it will take her to get back to normal. we do talk on the phone... for hours and even by video. that has all stopped. i told her im here for whatever she needs but shes so brief and cold. We do this because I am on vacation with family and she is 600 miles away

Had you explained what you just wrote in the beginning, the advice would be different.

I have two thoughts...

One, you may be losing her. You need to accept this, it is part of life. It sucks. We all go through this at some part of our lives. If she is shutting things down there isn't too much you can do about it. It sounds like you have already communicated to her about how you feel. The ball is in her court.

Two, your feelings matter too. It isn't fair for her to keep you waiting if she isn't being clear on what is going on. She doesn't get to say she wants "to get together and resume the relationship" without letting you know what is going on, or at least how much time she needs.

That is not a fair way for her to treat you. At some point, you need to move on and find someone who is emotionally there for you. I wouldn't wait very long if someone did this to me without telling me what the heck was going on.

My fault. How does it change then? She just told me that she just needs to take things very slow and that we are still dating (even though it doesnt feel like that at all)

Perhaps it would be helpful if you did things while you're on vacation that don't allow you the time to fret over when she'll next contact you.

She's told you she needs some space. That could mean that the relationship has been developing too quickly for her and she needs some time to reflect on things. It could also mean that she's preparing to end the relationship.

In either case, it means that you need to be doing things with your time other than thinking about her and when she'll be in touch.

If she really said things/you were too intense - and you comment that it's driving you crazy wondering ... she may be right .... could be too much and/or too soon.

I am wondering why she thinks this way all of a sudden bc she was intense too. We said the same things together. I dont think she is one to lie so i want to believe that when I return home things will be back to normal. I asked her if we can pick up where we left off when I left and she said "I'd like to."
Thats not a sign to me that s/o wants to end the relationship. I dont think

So maybe just a little bit more relaxed/casual will help.

In the meantime, focus on other stuff while you're on vacation.

she may have realized that all of it was getting too intense for her comfort level

The message is back off. It's clear that you don't seem to want to hear that.

Take the time on your vacation to focus on something else. That's what vacations are for. Otherwise, what you're doing is obsessing. that is not healthy for you or with any relationship with anyone.

How about honoring her request and broadening your horizons? It would the right thing as well as the polite thing to do.