What's going on?

Ah, Buyer's Remorse.

You're not the first person who ever had it, where you've got the trappings of a happy life but your eyes are wandering and you're wondering if that's all there is.

You won't be the last-ever person to feel this way, either.

Consider the consequences if you follow through with anything other than coffee with a friend. Even unmarried people can have nasty custody battles.

You might not give a damn about your partner (aside from a throwaway lines about loving this person dearly, the rest of your post is all about this other guy), but at least I would hope that you care about the future of your child.

You need not stay with your partner forever, but you might want to evaluate what it mean to cheat, and what that teaches your child about love and relationships (and yes, your child and your partner will figure out there's something going on).

Really love your partner, like you claim to? Then there's no reason not to go to coffee. Take your child, or your partner, or at least talk about them. You know, like people who aren't looking to cheat will do.

Wow judgemental, would it have made you feel different if I had posted a paragraph all about my current loving relationship?
I wanted a few opinions on the situation, not someone to analyse how much I have talked about my current relationship and then why that must mean I'm determine to cheat.
Also if you actually read what I wrote then you would see I am asking a question as I want to avoid a sticky situation, if it sounds like the other person wants more...but at the same time "no" I wouldn't take my child to meet someone who I have never met myself before !
Thanks for that though...helpful

Do you have any female friends?

You want a platonic relationship with another man you met online? That's not going to work, dear. You know that, too.

Keep yourself busy and cultivate a hobby or job. It sounds like you are bored.

Sorry if it came across that way.

You asked about a sticky situation. It is going to be a sticky situation if you go and don't talk about your real personal life. There's no getting around that.

This guy is looking to meet a woman. Period. Unless you make it abundantly clear that you aren't looking for a relationship with him, he is going to assume that.

I know this because it has happened to me when requesting networking meetings, of all things. And I even made it clear that I was looking to network for job opportunities and nothing else!

Don't assume he has any idea that you are in a relationship unless you pretty much show up with a flashing sign that says, "I'm taken!"

Seriously. People will ignore what doesn't fit into their world view.

Thank you.

ask them

also ask your partner how they feel about you meeting someone else

' Take your child, or your partner, or at least talk about them. You know, like people who aren't looking to cheat will do.'

Who else will pay to see THAT?

Hon, jespan's post is judgemental?
Wait until others will come
They will left no shreds of your 'coffee theory'.

But let me start. I am btw most understanding of cheaters here. One of most.
However I hate liars.

You had been thinking of the person whom you never met for years
AND
you had a baby with your man
AND
you still thinking about another man
AND
you flying off the handles when suggested that you will cheat 100%
if he is not repulsive in person...???

Get real! You are not happy with your man and you are not 'loving him dearly'. You want to **** this stranger so come out and admit it. Coffee my ass...

It's difficult to know what this person's intentions are - so I will ask what is your intention?

Why are you so drawn to this person? What is missing in your marriage that you are going back and playing these tapes in your mind? What was happening in your marriage that you were "chatting" with this kind of person, anyway, leading to a desired meeting? (I am assuming this is a man who is interested in meeting you. )

How do you know that this man is not meeting hundreds of other lonely married women? Some me like that challenge and like to mess with married women, since they usually don't leave their husbands for just an affair.

Are you going to tell your partner about your meeting?? If not, its shady, and would be sticky.. I've always said if you feel you need to hide something, you shouldn't be doing it due to the inherent shame. Since you are still hung up on this person, you may want to examine what is missing in your primary relationship.

Ok so you've been with your partner for 9 years and love him dearly? So what is your definition of love?? Love to me is the gift of giving to your partner. Men and women have different love needs that we need to attend to inorder to keep the fire burning. Love is work.. Now, somewhere along the way this process has stopped and you have now looked elsewhere, putting you in an emotionally gratifying situation because your needs are now been met by the new guy. Of course it's going to be exciting.. New flames and the possibilities usually are! What you've got to understand is how you would feel if your partner did exactly the same thing? This is an example of the test of commitment! Temptation will always be around..there will always be someone taller, more handsome, more attentitive, more funny then your partner but the question is do you have what it takes to be strong and stand by your man through the hard times and temptation is all around? I think you should if you've been together for 9 years! You owe that to one another.. First things first though, you need to be open to your partner and communicate what it is you need from him. This will stop the doubt and clear up what you are missing emotionally in your relationship. It will be hard at first but you must ask for what you need if your relationship is to survive and if he truly loves you he will attend to your needs. Now you wanted to know whether it would take you to a sticky situation. YES IT WILL!! You will complicate everything! To complicate is to add unnecessary things into your life but it is far better to simplify things, taking things out.. Especially in this situation. I think you need to get back and work on your relationship with your partner... You will only get out what you put in...