Intended Affair

Please help me understand and cope with this hurt. I know others have worse situations but this is tearing me apart. My husband (of 15 years) and I had a terrible time around 6 years ago and I was just not able to handle a sexual relationship because of the trauma we were going through. We were just not able to help each other at that time, however, we have rebuilt our relationship and are happy now. During that time he entered a sex chat room and sent explicit emails to a woman. I found one of those emails by mistake just a couple days ago. In the email he told her he loved me but was looking for sex a couple times a month. He admitted to me that he met up with her once but felt so guilty that he left before anything happened. Unbelievably I contacted her and she responded after 6 years. She told me the same story without being coached. Even though he did not have sex with her - at least that is what he is saying - I feel totally betrayed and don't know how to trust him and remain in love with him. He says he would never do something like that now because he is too much in love with me and that he was just searching for something during this terrible time. I don't know how to go forward and it feels like my heart is breaking.