0
   

Essay for Toefl i really appreciate for the help plz check it out

 
 
Vns9x
 
Reply Wed 24 Sep, 2014 07:41 am
Topic Do you agree or disagree that childhood is the most important time in a person's life

Numerous people consider that childhood years are crucial.Yet,the rest think opposite due to the fact that it is realy depend upon the person and circumstances.However I strongly believe that childhood years are important because it is the first stage.Furthermore without a proper beginning you can not obtain the desirable outcome.
First things first,imitation.At this stage a child usually tries to imitate actions from their parents.Even though strangers or friends can also make a huge impact on child's personalities.Despite this possibility majority of kids are always stick to parents because most of their time are with their parents especially in young age. Therefore it is my first reason.
Secondly but nonetheless is knowledge.At this period a child has tremendous questions to ask because they are not experienced yet and at this point the information that is going to comprehend is essential.Some of the information might be useless for a certain period of time but I have a strong belief that knowledge is always usefull no matter what happens.Moreover those are some preliminary knowledge that decide whether kids are prepared for the next stage or not.Thus it is my second reason.
By way of a conclusion,based on the arguments explored above.I consider that childhood is a significant time in a peson's life .That is the period where your character is forming.And also the very first knowledge that you are about to possess without it you cannot go to the next level .So yes indeed I completely agree with the statement and consider childhood is a considerable time in a human's life.
 
jespah
 
  3  
Reply Wed 24 Sep, 2014 07:48 am
@Vns9x,
2 things (there are more, but let's start with 2).

1) Use spell check. Seriously. Usefull (for example) is spelled incorrectly. There may be other misspellings but that one leaped out immediately.
2) Your essay is rather obviously padded. Sentences like "Therefore it is my first reason." are a clear indicator to pretty much every teacher out there that you're stuffing words into an essay, probably to make some minimal word count, without really saying anything.

I'll let others come along and mention subject/verb agreement, adding a space after a period, adding a blank row (hard carriage return) at the end of a paragraph, word choice and definition, etc. Plus you might want to look at your reasoning. I recognize that the purpose of this essay is more to see whether you understand the language versus your reasoning skills, but the reasoning being offered here is not up to collegiate level for most (if any) schools.
0 Replies
 
 

Related Topics

deal - Question by WBYeats
Drs. = female doctor? - Question by oristarA
Let pupils abandon spelling rules, says academic - Discussion by Robert Gentel
Please, I need help. - Question by imsak
Is this sentence grammatically correct? - Question by Sydney-Strock
"come from" - Question by mcook
 
  1. Forums
  2. » Essay for Toefl i really appreciate for the help plz check it out
Copyright © 2019 MadLab, LLC :: Terms of Service :: Privacy Policy :: Page generated in 0.03 seconds on 09/22/2019 at 11:44:44