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Annotation for the short film

 
 
Reply Thu 4 Sep, 2014 11:10 am
Hi! I need an english-language annotation to send my short film to a festival.
I'm not a native speaker so please help to correct my mistakes and I will mention you in titles )

"Deep inside an abandoned industrial area, in a bottomless pit lies unknown danger... This is a dream, that a jealous guy Ilya sees. His beloved girl cheats on him with his best friend. Or does she? What if that is only an illusion? And the scary dream is a reality?"
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dkva
 
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Reply Tue 9 Sep, 2014 06:11 am
@steppencat,
This has much more gravitas to me... don't worry if you don't like it or it's too long.

Inside an abandoned industrial area is a bottomless pit where unknown danger lies! In his dream Ilya, a jealous guy, is scared, but he feels much worse when his beloved girl cheats on him with his best friend. Or does she? What if his life were turned upside down, and the things he believes to be true are an illusion and his horrifying dream a reality!
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