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Gift suggest for surgery patient?

 
 
Linkat
 
Reply Tue 2 Sep, 2014 11:29 am
My friend's little boy (12) is going in for a kidney transplant this week. Fortunately his cousin is donating a kidney for him. I would like to give a gift to both -- the little boy going through this experience and his cousin, a sweet generous young woman in her early 20s.

I grew up with my friend and her brother (the dad of the donating girl). I really do not know the girl well - met her a few times, but other than a few words I personally do not know her. The boy, my family and I have been around quite a few times, growing up a bit together.

I know I can ask my friend, but she is the type that would not want you to give anything and I also do not want to bother her as I know how difficult and how much time and stress this whole thing has been for her.

Also does anyone know any info on the process, how long, how he and she will feel, potentially when would be a good time to visit, anything that could help them out as well.
 
tsarstepan
 
  2  
Reply Tue 2 Sep, 2014 11:35 am
@Linkat,
Sorry in advance.
Let's get the obligatory Indian subcontinent gift shop spam link out of the way as it will now attract a lot of spam traffic in the future:
http://chennaigiftsforyou.spam
Wink

No more spammers need post to this thread. I got it covered. Wink
ossobuco
 
  1  
Reply Tue 2 Sep, 2014 11:38 am
@Linkat,
No advice, but I'm interested.

Our great raconteur, 2PacksADay, had a heart transplant last year. He still posts, but not very often. I think hearts are more complicated, but of course I don't know.

http://able2know.org/topic/221162-4#post-5572479
0 Replies
 
jespah
 
  2  
Reply Tue 2 Sep, 2014 12:29 pm
@Linkat,
I wonder if there's something you could get where it would be 2 halves of a whole, and give one to each of them?
0 Replies
 
Linkat
 
  1  
Reply Tue 2 Sep, 2014 12:44 pm
@tsarstepan,
thanks did not realize this would cause such a problem with spam.
glitterbag
 
  2  
Reply Tue 2 Sep, 2014 01:15 pm
@Linkat,
This is just a suggestion, but 12 year old boys may like comic books.....I wouldn't know which ones to recommend. Is Marvel still a big draw? Check with his Dad to see what he likes. Or if he likes cars, Car and Track can keep a kid mesmerized. Reading material is light to hold when you're weak but bored.

For the 20 year old, I'd suggest flowers. But check with the hospital first, in some of the critical areas food and candy are not allowed.

0 Replies
 
Butrflynet
 
  1  
Reply Tue 2 Sep, 2014 02:37 pm
@Linkat,
Will they be in the same room together while recovering in the hospital or at home?

How about an inexpensive walkie talkie set so they can talk with each other over it while in the hospital and while in each of their homes.

Here is one that is simple enough to operate and does at a distance up to 2 miles. Cost is $38. There are others that can go up to 10 miles.

http://www.amazon.com/Spy-Gear-Ultra-Walkie-Talkie/dp/B00CNNPPA2/ref=sr_1_5?ie=UTF8&qid=1409689978&sr=8-5&keywords=walkie+talkie+for+kids

http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/71c1Ew-LchL._SL1500_.jpg
Linkat
 
  1  
Reply Tue 2 Sep, 2014 03:09 pm
Thanks for the ideas - I might just call the hospital. I have been in touch with the mom via email. I feel guilty actually contacting via email, but it is actually easier for her during their several visits a week to the hospital for dialysis. I try to keep things lighter for her as I know she is stressed via our network of family - her mom lives up the street from my mom (and not to mention the obvious trying to work full time saving endangered creatures while trying to take care of a very ill child).

I was worried about what would be allowed in the hospital as far as food or flower type gifts - how ill everyone would feel/stressed or otherwise whether my visit would be welcomed (not that they would not welcome me, just do they need more time alone for recovery).
ehBeth
 
  3  
Reply Tue 2 Sep, 2014 04:55 pm
@Linkat,
we need boomer and missy to check in on gifts for a 12 y.o. boy

for the young woman, I'd suggest something like a small gift basket of fancy toiletries that she might not usually spoil herself with
0 Replies
 
glitterbag
 
  3  
Reply Tue 2 Sep, 2014 05:25 pm
@Linkat,
As far as folks visiting a patient after surgery, everybody is different. Over the years I've had numerous surgeries, I don't like to have a lot of visitors. When I'm sick or recovering, I like to sleep and not engage in conversation. I love my brother, but he always shows up when I've left recovery and just put in a room. Then he wants to laugh and joke, and it is exhausting trying to talk when your weak or in pain. Plus, he gets loud and disturbs the other patients. When I've asked him to lower his voice, that's his cue to step it up.

The last time I had surgery it was performed on a Monday but he thought it was going to be Wednesday. I just called when I got home, and told him they had a sudden opening and I didn't have time to call to tell him. I know that sounds like I'm a terrible sister, but the last surgery left me in terrible pain and I just couldn't deal with him trying to entertain the hospital staff and other patients while I felt so sick.

But other people like visitors because it cheers them up. Especially if it's a long term stay, visitors break up the monotony. I'm not sure how long the hospital stay is for transplants, but I'm guessing the donor gets to go home earlier.

I just thought of something else, you can always arrange for a dinner or lunch for the family, even after everybody is home. It will lighten their load a little. If other friends and relatives want to help, see if you can find out who is coordinating efforts, and volunteer to help. Sometimes just having someone stop by to walk your dog is helpful.
0 Replies
 
mismi
 
  2  
Reply Tue 2 Sep, 2014 05:45 pm
@Linkat,
Hey Linkat! Prayers are with them both. I will be honest. 12 year old boys - as a whole - certainly not all....like electronic games. My little boy who is 11 said that if he were feeling badly he would like something like a game to keep his mind off of being sick. He suggested finding out what kind of device he has and give him an iTunes gift card (which would also allow him to download movies and such) and games before he goes through the surgery so he could have them ready afterwards. He said that if he has Nintendo DS then getting him a game like Mario Bros. or a baseball game. I can attest that he would play them ad nauseum if I let him.

They love this one - http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/614TNOjmMRL._SL160_SL150_.jpg

For her I think I would get her something like a pedicure BEFORE she goes into the hospital. I always like to have pretty toes when I have surgery or something. Weird but true. Or even a nice pillow with a pretty pillow case to have in the hospital. Smile Love pillows. Anyway - I hope this helps.

Keep us updated on how they are doing.
0 Replies
 
boomerang
 
  2  
Reply Tue 2 Sep, 2014 06:53 pm
It's hard without knowing the kid but I suggest Lego. Mo and his friends still enjoy playing with them. (Heck, I still enjoy playing with them.)

The sets for older kids can be pretty expensive though and I don't know what you're thinking of spending. If you're near a Lego store you could probably put together a loose block gift bag for less than a kit.

There's something kind of comforting about Lego.....

Maybe that's just us.

I think an Amazon gift card would be a good gift for the brave 20 year old girl. That way there are too many options she could get if music and movies aren't her thing, unlike an iTunes gift card.

Maybe a subscription to Amazon Prime? (I think it's like $70 for a year.)

Maybe a some luxury pajamas! Everyone loves luxury pajamas.
0 Replies
 
Linkat
 
  1  
Reply Wed 3 Sep, 2014 04:08 am
@Linkat,
thanks all -- I think I will send a quick note to my friend. I want to send a quick encouraging note to wish them all well. I will put in there that since I work in Boston it will be easy for me to come on over -- let me know what works for you.

I think she would enjoy the visit also.

Yes - I do believe the little boy likes legos - I have when they were younger bought them lego sets. Yeah some can be expensive. Unfortunately I am not a good planner and did not think about a pre-gift - excellent ideas. I also know they do play electronics - not sure which gaming system they have, but my girls most likely do as they have played with them.

I could ask about their dogs (they have several) - another great idea - but unfortunately would only be in a position do so on the weekends as they live just far away from us that during the week with school and work would not be possible.

Bringing food over or perhaps a gift card to the local pizza place sounds promising as well - would be very good for when they arrive home.

Again thanks.
0 Replies
 
firefly
 
  1  
Reply Thu 4 Sep, 2014 11:03 am
@Linkat,
For the little boy, a gift card to Best Buy would allow him to buy a video game of his own choosing. He could even order it online.

For the young woman, a gift card to Amazon.com or any large department store, like Macys, would also allow her to pick out something she might like.

I think gift cards are always a safe choice and I've found they're always appreciated. You can put them inside a nice card and attach that to a cute stuffed toy, or a box of bakery cookies, and add some balloons, etc. when you visit the hospital.



Linkat
 
  1  
Reply Thu 4 Sep, 2014 11:28 am
@firefly,
thanks that is a great idea - especially with a stuffed animal or cookies - I like to add the personal touch.

I hope to hear today how it all went - I guess it depends on how late/if the mom is up to sending a quick email or text.
0 Replies
 
Linkat
 
  3  
Reply Fri 5 Sep, 2014 10:20 am
Not sure exactly what happened but there was a little scare (she didn't give specifics) but all is fine now. They are discouraging visitors because of immunosuppressants while in the hospital. But they plan to have him walk today; the donor is in much pain but they plan to have her walk as well.

She says all is good.

So I think what I might plan for the family is either to send some food over or give a gift card to get take out.

And maybe send via mail a gift card to the donor for when she gets home -- can't really use one much in the hospital.
mismi
 
  1  
Reply Sat 6 Sep, 2014 06:42 pm
@Linkat,
How are they doing Linkat?
glitterbag
 
  1  
Reply Sat 6 Sep, 2014 07:03 pm
@Linkat,
I spoke with an old friend who donated a kidney to a co-worker. She said her post op was easy, she recovered quickly and the recipient is doing well. But everybody is different and surgery isn't always precise or identical. I hope both the young man and young women recover quickly, and I'm sure any gift you choose will be welcome during their recovery. I hope things are going well for both of them.
0 Replies
 
ossobuco
 
  0  
Reply Sat 6 Sep, 2014 07:30 pm
I've an odd idea or two, and whether they would be useful would depend on the boy. I was in the hospital five days last august (am fine, thank you, except for the ambulance bill - it turned out to be my meds that did it) and I had to get people to scrounge me some reading material, as I'm an addictive reader. So, if he likes to read, that is one thing.

The next is that I finally asked the night nurse to get me some paper and a pen or two, and something as a base, like a clipboard. I drew the room.. not so easy to get the angles from a bed point of view.
I'm well trained in drawing, drafting, painting, but that all starts somewhere. I started myself by copying the Broomhilda comic strips when I was in my early twenties. So - pencils, paper, a clipboard.

Back when I first took a drawing class, one of the assignments was to draw your telephone. This was when telephones were bigger, but you get the idea.

Or maybe he would like to write his thoughts.
0 Replies
 
Linkat
 
  3  
Reply Sun 7 Sep, 2014 12:53 pm
@mismi,
The little boy is doing great - he wolfed down his first food (pancakes) post op his mom told me. The donor is having a harder time with pain and so forth. She told me the recovery is usually more difficult for the donor.

As the boy is at a children's hospital, the donor is just a little bit away at an excellent hospital - one where I had both my girls - they gave her a pay room - one that usually very wealthy and celebrities get. The hospital says they try to do that for anyone willing to donate as a little way to say thank you.

The mom did suggest a gift card being best for the donor as she is getting lots of flowers, fruit bouquets etc. from well wishers. I thought I would send one to her home of one of stores which she likes and is a pampering type.

And also thought I would wait for the boy until he got home as he too is getting lots, go visit them and give the family a gift card for a local place they like for take out so they can when they need something to eat use when needed and a little something extra for the little guy.
 

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