100000 sins as a gift to Satan (How do I do this, What sins should/could I commit?

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Type: Question • Score: 4 • Views: 2,155 • Replies: 35

[+4] - farmerman - 03/20/2020I woul start with removing the "DO NOT REMOVE UNDER PENALTY OF LAW" Stickers on all mattresses you can find. Satan will love your ass.
[+3] - edgarblythe - 03/20/2020That sounds pretty good too.
[+3] - Sturgis - 03/20/2020You cannot hate God and HeyZeus once you give up your soul. Says so in Beelzebub's Handbook of Satanic Rules and Regulations

@Kiatou666,

I woul start with removing the "DO NOT REMOVE UNDER PENALTY OF LAW" Stickers on all mattresses you can find. Satan will love your ass.

2 Replies

@farmerman,

Pretty sinister, farmerman. I was thinking about something a bit less nefarious, like swiping the dentures out of old ladies' mouths.

0 Replies

@farmerman,

I was thinking of rejecting God by selling my soul to Satan, worshipping him and hating God and Jesus...

6 Replies

@Kiatou666,

That sounds pretty good too.

0 Replies

@Kiatou666,

You cannot hate God and HeyZeus once you give up your soul.

Says so in Beelzebub's Handbook of Satanic Rules and Regulations

1 Reply

@Sturgis,

Zeus? I think you mean Jesus. Anyway what list of sins should I commit?

1 Reply

@Kiatou666,

sounds like you want to bite the BIG ONE. Satan's a pussy.

0 Replies

@Kiatou666,

I would go with masturbation. But for God's sake, use lotion.

2 Replies

@maxdancona,

no , for you its mathturbation.

1 Reply

@farmerman,

That would count as a sin function.

1 Reply

@maxdancona,

Im pullin you over fer drinkin an derivin.

0 Replies

You could give 100000 blow jobs.

1 Reply

@Olivier5,

Oh come on Oliver5.

If done properly, one blow job is worth at Least 4 sins.

Expert level is more like 9 per.

1 Reply

@chai2,

I don’t know about that. By Bill Clinton’s accounting it’s only worth 0.5 sin...

1 Reply

@Olivier5,

well if ya do it enough it really adds up.

2 Replies

@farmerman,

Hell has its price... The OP should get going ASAP. Way to go!

0 Replies

@farmerman,

farmerman wrote:

well if ya do it enough it really adds up.

I know.

It's a numbers game.

1 Reply

@Kiatou666,

Kiatou666 wrote:

I was thinking of rejecting God by selling my soul to Satan, worshipping him and hating God and Jesus...

Why stop there? Why not keep going and reject Satan, give your soul to God through acceptance of Jesus Christ as your lord and savior?

Maybe Satan has extra respect for those who take opposition to the point of defying Him and returning to God.

You'll never know till you try.

0 Replies

@chai2,

As a fan of Father Guido Sarducci, I suppose youd remember that line. It cme from his bit about the newest papal encyclical, "VITAM LABORUM est"
("Life is a Job).

Where the pope proposed that youd get paid in heavenly dollars for each day of good you did, and then youd be docked a certain amt of cash for each sin.
Like murder, youd lose about a million dollars, and stealing from the porr youd lose like 25000 dollars. Ten for masturbation youd lose like 25 cents ."And that adds up fpr some of you guys"

Did he die?

1 Reply

100000 sins as a gift to Satan (How do I do this, What sins should/could I commit?

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