Reply Sat 2 Aug, 2014 05:49 pm
I am 15 and this guy is 23 we have been hanging around as friends but we hold hands and we were probably gonna start dating but someone said that if we didn't stop dating they were going to call the cops on us. But my mom is okay with us dating /hanging out.. So is it legal or no what could happen?
 
maxdancona
 
  2  
Reply Sat 2 Aug, 2014 06:14 pm
@Hotpinkbug,
In most civilized countries, it is illegal for an adult and a 15 year old to have any sexual activity (the law do vary from place to place). When this happens the adult can go to jail. In many places this is considered a serious crime and is called "statutory rape", the idea being that kids don't have ability to make good choices and adults can take advantage of that.

More important is the reason for these laws. I agree with them.

Any good relationship is a relationship of equals. If a 23 year old is dating a 21 or 22 year old, they are both in the same place in life. They both can drive. They both have the responsibility to take care of themselves and to support themselves. They both have the ability to move or to get a real adult job.

If both people in a relationship are adults, then they start as equals. Neither person has more power than the other. They both have the same ability to make their own decisions and take their own responsibility.

If a 15 year old has a relationship with another 15 year old, it the same. They are equals.

An adult dating a teenager is not equal. Think about it. The adult in the relationship has all the money, all the control. He has more experience and knowledge. And, he can use all of these things. It doesn't a fair, balanced healthy relationship. A teenager is hopefully in school. A teenager might have a job, but isn't paying rent or responsible for her own bills. A teenager is making many decisions, but it still being cared for and protected (whether she appreciates it or not).

I understand that real life is complicated. You have these feeling and you know yourself and this guy. There are probably lots of reasons that you think this time, this relationship will somehow work. And, honestly I don't know... maybe it can. But there are an awful lot of ways that this type of unbalanced relationship can go horrible wrong.

I don't support adults having sexual relationships with teenagers.






Hotpinkbug
 
  1  
Reply Sat 2 Aug, 2014 06:24 pm
@maxdancona,
Yeah I get what your saying but we are not having sex. Like all we do is hold hands so far and I know he hasn't had sex yet.. I just don't know what to do about it. I really do care for him and he is the only guy I have ever met like this. I really just don't want to lose him.
neologist
 
  2  
Reply Sat 2 Aug, 2014 07:07 pm
@Hotpinkbug,
Same as I said in the other thread

Bad idea for both of you.
0 Replies
 
Ragman
 
  2  
Reply Sat 2 Aug, 2014 07:16 pm
@Hotpinkbug,
Bad idea...very bad idea. Believe me ... I'd bet your mom cares. She probably doesn't want you to rebel so she is not jumping on your case -- YET. Common sense has to come in somewhere. At age 23, he should have better judgment. Surely, your mom should have better judgment, too.

Do you really think that it's not going to end op as a sexual relationship if you continue?

You two are not compatible as he is NOT in the right age range. Besides, he could get arrested.
0 Replies
 
ehBeth
 
  2  
Reply Sat 2 Aug, 2014 07:22 pm
@Hotpinkbug,
Hotpinkbug wrote:
I really just don't want to lose him.



A 23 year-old considering a relationship with a 15 year-old is a loser. Don't worry about losing a loser.
0 Replies
 
izzythepush
 
  1  
Reply Sun 3 Aug, 2014 07:24 am
In the UK there's been some notorious cases of 20 something men befriending young girls. This is just one of them, but they all start out the same way, a young girl meets a man in his early 20s.

Quote:
Seven members of a sadistic paedophile ring are facing long jail sentences today as police and social workers apologised to their victims for failing to rescue them.

The vulnerable schoolgirls were plucked from the streets and care homes to be drugged, raped and sold into prostitution in the university city of Oxford.

The men were found guilty at the Old Bailey of a catalogue of offences including conspiracy to rape, child prostitution and trafficking over an eight-year period.

They were remanded in custody for sentencing on June 26.

Judge Peter Rook warned them: "You have been convicted of the most serious offences. Long custodial sentences are inevitable. "

Two sets of brothers, Akhtar Dogar, 32, and Anjum Dogar, 31, and Mohammed Karrar, 38, and Bassam Karrar, 33, were convicted along with Kamar Jamil, 27, Assad Hussain, 32, and Zeeshan Ahmed, 27.

Fighting broke out in the dock at the Old Bailey after two other defendants - Mohammed Hussain, 25, and a man who cannot be named for legal reasons - were cleared.

Zeeshan Ahmed struck out at Mohammed Hussain before being bundled out of the dock by officers.

The admissions of failure from the authorities came as it became apparent that police missed several chances to catch gang members before they were finally arrested.

Some victims relived their ordeals during the four month trial, describing how they were groomed, beaten, betrayed and sold into prostitution around the country.

One was still so frightened of her attackers that she refused to give evidence for fear of reprisals.

It was only after she was given legal advice that Girl D agreed to tell her story on a videolink from another room in the building.

She had been raped and prostituted at 11 by Mohammed Karrar, who bought her little gifts and showed her the first affection she had known.

Another victim, Girl A, complained of her plight to police on two occasions but no one was charged.

A care home manager refused to pay her taxi fare when she returned after absconding. The then 14-year-old was driven back to Oxford to be raped.

The carer was later sacked and the privately-run home where girls were placed by Oxford County Council was closed down.

The girls had been put into care because their behaviour was out of control and for their own protection.

Time after time, they disappeared from children's homes and were caught with older men by police, but the exploitation continued.

The six girls said they had been victims of men mostly of Asian origin in the Cowley area of East Oxford while aged between 11 and 15.

The gang was finally arrested after police and social services got together to form Operation Bullfinch.

By speaking to complainants and looking at their histories, they realised they were dealing with an organised grooming gang.

Girls were either threatened that they or their families would be harmed, or brainwashed into thinking they were betraying their lover if they talked to police.

Noel Lucas QC, prosecuting, told the jury: "They were vulnerable young girls, children who were out of control.

"It is a pattern that repeats itself time after time."

Senior police investigation officer Simon Morton said the victims were learning to live with their experiences.

He said: "This has been really difficult for them. They have had to relive it in open court.

"They are really proud they have been able to tell their stories at last.

"They have done it to prevent other girls going through it.

"They have been through possibly the most traumatic thing a child could go through."

He added: "Time is a great healer and I honestly hope it will."

All except two of the men were of Pakistani origin. The Karrar brothers were from north Africa.

The trial followed the jailing last year of Asian men in Rochdale for abusing vulnerable girls, another case where chances to stop the gang were missed.

Earlier this year the Association of Chief Police Officers and the Crown Prosecution Service announced new measures to change and improve their response to sexual offending, particularly involving children.

Police have arrested a further nine men from the Oxford area under Operation Bullfinch.

Mohammed Karrar was found guilty of 18 offences, many of them against Girl D. He was found guilty of rape of a child under 13 and procuring an abortion, conspiracy to rape, child prostitution and trafficking.

Akhtar Dogar was found guilty of 11 offences including rape, child prostitution and trafficking.

Anjum Dogar was found guilty of nine offences including rape, child prostitution and trafficking.

Bassam Karrar was found guilty of nine offences including rape of a child under 13, conspiracy to rape a girl under 13, child prostitution and trafficking.

Kamar Jamil was convicted of eight offences including rape, conspiracy to rape and child prostitution.

Assad Hussain and Zeeshan Ahmed were each convicted of two counts of sexual activity with a child.




http://www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/oxford-paedophile-ring-seven-guilty-1888992
0 Replies
 
lfc
 
  -3  
Reply Fri 8 Aug, 2014 05:45 am
Dating thing is still here and it's not that old.
0 Replies
 
Germlat
 
  1  
Reply Fri 8 Aug, 2014 07:28 am
Your comedy routine needs a lot of work.
CoastalRat
 
  2  
Reply Fri 8 Aug, 2014 08:15 am
@Hotpinkbug,
Why are you asking this again. You already asked this exact same thing on another thread. Did you not like the answers you were getting on the other thread? It does not matter how often you start up a new thread to ask this question, we are all going to continue to tell you it is NOT ok. HE could go to jail and probably should go to jail for dating a 15 year old (and you failed to mention in this thread that you only just turned 15 about 3 months ago.)

This is not a good situation for you and can lead to jail time for him. STAY AWAY FROM HIM.
0 Replies
 
contrex
 
  1  
Reply Sat 9 Aug, 2014 05:43 am
@Germlat,
Germlat wrote:

Your comedy routine needs a lot of work.


The spelling could do with a tweak as well.
Germlat
 
  1  
Reply Sat 9 Aug, 2014 07:11 am
@contrex,
"It" was drunk-posting...I bet.
0 Replies
 
nononono
 
  0  
Reply Mon 11 Aug, 2014 04:28 am
@Hotpinkbug,
Quote:
I am 15 and this guy is 23 we have been hanging around as friends but we hold hands and we were probably gonna start dating but someone said that if we didn't stop dating they were going to call the cops on us. But my mom is okay with us dating /hanging out.. So is it legal or no what could happen?


I'm probably the only person here who's gonna give you legit advice.

You are 15 YEARS OLD.

Read some damn books!

Enjoy being 15! Quit thinking about a MAN who is 8 YEARS older than you!

Being 15 years old is FUN. Enjoy the fun! It WILL NOT last forever!

Don't jump WAY ahead, because you can't jump backwards after the fact!
0 Replies
 
lfc
 
  -4  
Reply Mon 11 Aug, 2014 07:39 am
Follow your heart...If u like that guy...go for him and if u don't like him...leaveit.
jespah
 
  4  
Reply Mon 11 Aug, 2014 07:48 am
@lfc,
No. You don't do stupid things like this when you're a 15 year old girl and the guy - possibly a sexual predator and certainly has social issues if he's looking for dates at the local high school.

15 year old girls who do this kind of stupid **** end up as 16 year old mothers. And their hearts don't pay for baby shoes.
0 Replies
 
lfc
 
  0  
Reply Tue 12 Aug, 2014 05:28 am
IF the guy goes and have sex with her. That's also a point you made. But you never know what happens next.
0 Replies
 
lfc
 
  0  
Reply Wed 13 Aug, 2014 04:23 am
But it depends on the situation as well.
0 Replies
 
 

Related Topics

 
  1. Forums
  2. » Dating is to old or no
Copyright © 2021 MadLab, LLC :: Terms of Service :: Privacy Policy :: Page generated in 0.06 seconds on 07/28/2021 at 02:49:05