Life's a Laugh, and Death's a joke it's true.

Your mention of suicide is an interesting subject in itself. I think there are many reasons why people take their own life, and I also believe that many take their life without understanding that no one really knows how their lives would have turned out if they have lived. I think depression is a killer for many, and many do not seek professional help that could have helped them.

I remember when I lived in Chicago after high school, and I earned a living as a teletype biller for a wholesale company, and made very little money. I used to frequent a restaurant in our neighborhood, and got to know the young waitress working there. When I didn't see her at work, I asked what happened to her, and they told me she committed suicide. She must have been in her early twenties.

That has stuck with me forever. Many young people don't know whether their lives will be fruitful and productive if they don't give life a chance. I find that rather sad.

I was born alone and will die alone. Death is easy, life is hard.

Dear littleme, fwiw, I'm not afraid to die. I wish I could advise or share something that would help you. Do you see a psychiatrist? A therapist who works with elderly people? I live with mental illness, too. I have wanted to die, wished I'd never been born, since I was 3-4 years old. For many reasons I will never commit suicide. There have been periods of time in my over 50 years when I did not think about death all the time. But now I do again because some medications I take are causing so many problems for me. I fell down as the result, and now have pain in several places. My hands don't move well anymore. I used to be very fast, very efficient, very accurate. I have lost those things. Also, I do want to die alone. I don't want people fussing around me and over me.

Amazing! A day when I agree with timur.

Ive had and have a great life but I'm not afraid of death, even look forward to it.

But to the OP poster, start with thinking what you would like to do Right Now and either do it or move in the direction of that desire. Don't rule out ANYTHING as long as it doesn't hurt anyone else. Might be as simple as something to eat or a desire to change the world; doesn't matter.

If you truly cannot think of anything, you do lack the minimum requirement for happiness and are in serious trouble.

But make sure you have really exhausted all the possibilities for something to look forward to before deciding to check out.

I'm not afraid of dying. But I am afraid if there would be pain.

I am age 72 and no longer fear death. In my twenties and thirties I did panic much like you. I could not go to sleep and paced the house worrying about it even though I had a husband, children, job and a few close friends. I have been on meds too.
Life does not fly by, it's long and slow and living is hard. "Life is hard" my 92-yr-old neighbor said to me a few days ago. She lives alone, as do I, and cooks, does her laundry and except for brief illness mostly looks great.
By age 40 ( Life begins at 40 was true for me) I was too busy to think about death. I was consumed by the needs of others. Now that I am older it's mostly good and I don't mind the idea of being dead at all...it comes with being old. The fear is totally gone.
Life is a terrible storm with lightening bolts of joy. Wait for the bolts.

You'll be okay. (hug)

I'm amazed at what life has offered me, and I'm now 82 years old. I have traveled to many parts of this world, and feel fortunate that I have many friends in different countries and across the US. My health isn't 100% now because I had kidney failure, but still feel pretty healthy. Was invited by my travel buddy to have a return visit to Cuba in November, but my wife and I are doing a river cruise from Memphis to New Orleans. I haven't been afraid of death for many decades, and I'm not sure why. I believe when it's our time, we will just die. In the mean time, we try to eat healthy and exercise every day by walking. It's 11:27am now, and we've already walked over 1,500 steps. We may not walk much this afternoon, because we're expecting over 100 degrees today.

i miss those reaper cartoons

well, thankyou Luis; I am receiving your words like a gift insight into my future death.