@georgeob1,
Not a lot of time right now so have to skip discussion between yourself and the handsome gentleman who looks a bit like Custer.
This symbolism thing is not simple. Let me try to lay out what I'm thinking in a sequential manner.
1) Groups or communities must establish agreements and consensus simply to function as a collective. This is foundational and is what defines a group of any sort or size. Where there's no agreement/consensus, there's no group.
2) Groups (nations, clubs, political parties, etc) develop means or systems to encourage or enforce maintenance of consensus (socialization/education/indoctrination, laws, policing, penalties for violations, etc)
3) How tightly that consensus is fostered, maintained and policed/penalized varies group to group and issue to issue. The severity here is a pretty good measure of whether terms like 'totalitarian' are appropriate. One can place, with some real value, the 'conservative' ideologies or 'liberal' ideologies on this scale (which is why I might recommend, for your Halloween costume this year, george, a bushy Stalin moustache. I'm going as a French prostitute with pink eyelashes and mismatched nylons and a pipe stuffed with an illegal substance. I'm confident that both of us, in our own ways, will have fun).
4) Because we are the sort of creatures we are - human language users in complex societal structures - we use stories to pass on experiential wisdom (don't cry wolf too much) and to forward and solidify our group agreements regarding 'reality' and values (mess with God's eternal rules and you'll end up a salt pillar, bub). And here is where symbolism of the sort we're looking at, seems to come in. It appears to function as an efficient short-cut to remind group members of prior stories (with all their baggage). A flag or a statue or a building = lotsa group stuff.
5) You're right. Symbols aren't 'evil'. What they are or can be is damned dangerous (just as ideas can be dangerous - surely we are looking at two facets of the same thing). What we invest in the symbol is where the problems sit, or can sit. It depends on what we might invest in the symbol, that is, what we think it is functionally identical to. If I accept that my grandmother's grave IS my grandmother (or her essence or some such) and if some dude poops on that grave (He is pooping on my real sweet fragile granny!), then I may well act in some manner which is insane. Absolutely, completely bonkers.
I'll leave it there. The symbol isn't the thing. Conceive or act as if it is and you go straight into crazy.