6
   

Does "I'd go metric for you" mean "I will do anything for you"?

 
 
Reply Mon 14 Jul, 2014 12:16 am

Context:

"I'll tell you what they said about me. Then you tell me what they said about you."

"Okay, deal."

"Women said, "What's with his hair? Is it real? Is that his real color?" They said, "Ooh, me so horny, me want humpy astronaut." They said, "I'd go metric for you, baby." Guys weren't as descriptive. They just called me nothing, but once they saw my face, they knew the sports segment was over and could switch off the set." He lit a cigarette then lay back and chuckled. "TV.Ugh. "

Susan spooned into him. The sheets felt like cool pastry marble.

She said, "Near the end they knew they had enough episodes to syndicate, so they stopped focus-grouping. But at the start I got stuff like "I can see the zits underneath her makeup. Can't you guys find her a putty knife? That's one helluva thick paper bag she's trying to act her way out of. Her tits are like fried eggs gone all runny." That kind of stuff." Their eyes caught and they both laughed.

"I've gotta phone in this grocery order." Eugene punched a phone number into the cordless, and the touch-tone beeps reminded Susan of a song she used to like back in the eighties.
 
View best answer, chosen by oristarA
oristarA
 
  1  
Reply Mon 14 Jul, 2014 09:23 am
@oristarA,
Look like it is written by an unwelcoming author whose description would be ignored by you guys.
Did the speaker say something obscene?
maxdancona
 
  3  
Reply Mon 14 Jul, 2014 09:44 am
@oristarA,
Geez! that it poorly written, I am not sure that is even English.

I don't have a clue what the author is talking about.
Lordyaswas
 
  3  
Reply Mon 14 Jul, 2014 11:32 am
@maxdancona,
Agreed.

Not a clue.
0 Replies
 
contrex
  Selected Answer
 
  3  
Reply Mon 14 Jul, 2014 12:58 pm
@oristarA,
oristarA wrote:

Look like it is written by an unwelcoming author whose description would be ignored by you guys.
Did the speaker say something obscene?

The problem, I think, may be that you gave only the trivial context (the surrounding text) not the deeper context (the name of the author, the title of the work, where you saw it). You keep doing this. [WHY?}

The prose looks like what you see see in a lot of modern writing that purports to be "edgy", so ably parodied by the late Gilbert Sorrentino.

Having said that, I suspect that "going metric" may be a (possibly freshly invented) North American metaphor for "going to extraordinary lengths" - the US is well known for clinging to the mediaeval "imperial system" of measurement (feet, inches, pounds, gallons, etc) while the rest of the world has "gone metric" (adopted the metric system - metres, centimetres, kilogrammes, litres, etc).

[UPDATE]It's from a short story called "Miss Wyoming" by Douglas Coupland, the author of Generation X

Quote:
Douglas Coupland (born December 30, 1961) is a Canadian novelist. His fiction is complemented by recognized works in design and visual art arising from his early formal training. His first novel, the 1991 international bestseller Generation X: Tales for an Accelerated Culture, popularized terms such as McJob and Generation X. He has published thirteen novels, two collections of short stories, seven non-fiction books, and a number of dramatic works and screenplays for film and television. A specific feature of Coupland's novels is their synthesis of postmodern religion, Web 2.0 technology, human sexuality, and pop culture.


Quote:
Miss Wyoming
by Douglas Coupland

The absurd and tender story of a hard-living movie producer and a former child beauty pageant contender who only find each other by losing themselves.

Waking up in an L.A. hospital, John Johnson is amazed that it was the flu and not an overdose of five different drugs mixed with cognac that nearly killed him.


Like I said...
0 Replies
 
contrex
 
  1  
Reply Mon 14 Jul, 2014 01:14 pm
Not a short story, a novel.
0 Replies
 
JTT
 
  1  
Reply Mon 14 Jul, 2014 05:03 pm
@oristarA,
While there is the odd thing that might be misunderstood, generational things, I don't understand why Max and Lordy make claims to be so thick.
0 Replies
 
oristarA
 
  1  
Reply Mon 14 Jul, 2014 06:10 pm
Thank you guys.
Some questions remain:
1) Does "me so horny, me want humpy astronaut" mean "I am so hot/sexy; I want a strong-muscle man"?
2) Does " Guys weren't as descriptive" mean "guys weren't good at describing a woman"?
djjd62
 
  2  
Reply Mon 14 Jul, 2014 06:33 pm
it could mean, if you give them 2.5 centimetres they'll take a metre
0 Replies
 
JTT
 
  1  
Reply Mon 14 Jul, 2014 10:37 pm
@oristarA,
Quote:
I am so hot/sexy


I can't be sure, Ori, but I think you mean to say,

I am so hot and bothered, sexed up, horny, hot to trot, ... .

In "I am so hot/sexy" the speaker is saying that is how "I" must appear to others. It doesn't mean "ready for sex", which is what I think you mean, rather it means "sexually attractive to others".
oristarA
 
  1  
Reply Tue 15 Jul, 2014 12:19 am
@JTT,
JTT wrote:

Quote:
I am so hot/sexy


I can't be sure, Ori, but I think you mean to say,

I am so hot and bothered, sexed up, horny, hot to trot, ... .

In "I am so hot/sexy" the speaker is saying that is how "I" must appear to others. It doesn't mean "ready for sex", which is what I think you mean, rather it means "sexually attractive to others".


Thanks.
Would any one like to answer the second question:
2) Does " Guys weren't as descriptive" mean "guys weren't good at describing a woman"?
JTT
 
  2  
Reply Tue 15 Jul, 2014 08:05 am
@oristarA,
Quote:
Would any one like to answer the second question:
2) Does " Guys weren't as descriptive" mean "guys weren't good at describing a woman"?


No, it means that the guys didn't describe as vividly as the women. The male is talking in that paragraph telling how he was described.
oristarA
 
  1  
Reply Tue 15 Jul, 2014 08:12 am
@JTT,
Cool.
Does "humpy astronaut" mean "most strong man on Earth"?
JTT
 
  1  
Reply Tue 15 Jul, 2014 08:22 am
@oristarA,
Quote:
Does "humpy astronaut" mean "


I take 'humpy' not as an adjective but as a verb.


They said, "Ooh, me so horny, me want humpy astronaut."

can, I think, be translated as,

I am so horny, I want to hump (****) an astronaut.

oristarA
 
  1  
Reply Tue 15 Jul, 2014 08:27 am
@JTT,
JTT wrote:

Quote:
Does "humpy astronaut" mean "


I take 'humpy' not as an adjective but as a verb.


They said, "Ooh, me so horny, me want humpy astronaut."

can, I think, be translated as,

I am so horny, I want to hump (****) an astronaut.




This answer is horny as well.
Thank you JTT.
I got this from urban dict:
It seems working also.
humpy
(adj.) used to describe a person, usually male, whose body is beautifully sculpted or "humped" with muscles. Having this characterstic typically makes him "humpable," although not in the case of such humpy persons as Lou Fariggno or that annoying blond australopithecine who sells exercise equipment on infommercials.
After leaving his weight-training class, Ignacio looked all humpy.
JTT
 
  2  
Reply Tue 15 Jul, 2014 06:47 pm
@oristarA,
The verb HUMP meaning to copulate/**** is much older than Urban dictionary, Ori. M-W says 1785 though it doesn't specifically say that was the formation of this meaning.
0 Replies
 
 

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