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Thu 29 May, 2014 03:28 am
so basically. Me and my friends are a pretty big group and we're really good friends. And one of my friend started dating this guy and they were so in love and everything. And this guy and me became friends. JUST FRIENDS. I think we connected 'cause both of us have overbearing parents who want to decide our career and future and stuff. And we could share our frustrations, you know.
But trust me, we were/are just friends. He even said I'm like one of his buddies (quote "you're like a guy who's a girl"). In short: my friend thought he liked/likes me and fought with him about it for about a week before he got annoyed and broke up with her ('cause she didn't trust him). And I tried to be there for her despite the awkwardness. And I asked him to text her and to try to stay friends. I know it wasn't my place but I understood that she felt like he had cut her out of his life.
Anyways, so after their breakup I contemplated on breaking all (platonic) ties with him. I mean, it really sucks being stuck between two people, you know. But he's such a great friend and he and I understand each other well and I thought, this is where I got really really selfish, "why should I have to compromise my life when its not harming anyone?" BUT apparently, it was hurting my friend. And, no matter how selfish I am and can be, I love my friend. I mean, I've known her for so long, right? (sister's before mister's and all that) So I plainly and simply told him that we should stop communicating and knowing him, he was probably very annoyed. He's a very practical guy, so...
So, now I expected my friend to, if not be okay with me, at least stop with her crying about her insecurities about us (me and her ex a.k.a my guy friend). I know she's hurt about the break up and I understand that she's gonna take time to heal from it but its not like I'm not totally unhurt too. I've lost two friends in this BIG drama too. Anyways, she's still not really talking to me. Like, she replies to me and everything but her words are covered in ice, if you know what I mean. Like, she's doing it reluctantly.
And I just don't know what to do. ALL of my friends (from our group) are being weird now toward me and I think I'm slipping into depression. What should I do? Please help.
btw, I'm 17 years old.
@gracehere,
You should talk to her and tell her it's not ok what she's doing.
You know you're still young and there is time to make new friends. If she acts like that she's not your friend. Discuss with her and tell her what you think. She shouldn't decide for you who are your friends and who are not.
@gracehere,
Stop letting other people dictate who your friends are.
If you want to be friends with this guy, then be friends with him. This is not disloyalty to your female friend. He is allowed to know other people, and so are you.
You're female friend is being nuts. Her insecurities should not run your (or his) life. So be pals with him, and if she cannot figure out that you and he aren't an item, then her opinion is kinda worthless in this whole equation. And she should work on herself.
@adele123,
I did try but she's now blatantly ignoring me
And yes, that's what I thought too but its just so weird. I mean, these people, her included, are people I've known for sooo many years and I thought we were too close to ever come to this :/ eh whatever, senior year's gonna suck but I've the rest of my life after that right?
@jespah,
at first, I did ignore it and me and him were still talking and stuff. But the other girls are saying things to make me feel guilty just for continuing to be friends with him, like I picked sides or something. Like, this one time, my friend texted me asking if I was texting him and I've just learned that one of the other girl and my friend's cousin was with her too ('cause the other girl let it slip to me that I was "too casual" about my answer). That only makes me feel more like an outsider, you know. And the other girl also says that I should have immediately cut ties with him after he and my friend had broken up, "because that's what a friend would have done and you've known her longer than you've known him."
I don't know. I'm starting to feel like they're putting all of the blame on me, even the reason for their break up in the first place. And whenever I say that the reason for their break up was her insecurity and her lack of trust in him, they make me feel like I'm putting the blame on her! ugh! I'm hating life right now
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