HELP!!! ASAP What should I do? My boyfriend's ex is back!!!

#1 Movie relationships aren't real. No matter how perfect something looks from the outside, it's not.

#2 If you are sure "he's the one" after 3 months and you're 20 years old, wait 9 months more and reevaluate. If you think 9 months is too long a time, he not the one.

#3 If you think someone will leave you because of someone elses appearance, you're immature.

#4 If he does leave for that reason, he wasn't "the one"


And why are you screaming help ASAP! If you feel you need to have an answer to your life situation immediately, you have no idea what a long term relationship takes.

Life is not ASAP, it takes a life time.

I think as well as chai2 that you are acting a immature. And that will not take you anywhere. You have to focous and be reallistic.
First something to boost a little bit your confidence if he is really handsome as you say maybe you are not as average as you may think. There must be something he liked of you. But beenig realistic theres no such thing as handsome or ugly because every opinion is completelly relative to the likes of an individual. There can be a girl who belives he is not handsome at all.
So then lets go to the real issues. Why start a relationship if he knew that her former gf was on a trip for only a year.
There are to options, the optimistic is that he likes you (note: i didnt say love you, don´t mix this up, we men go a little bit slower than women in that aspect of feelings). The pesimist he was bored and he needed a distraction and it happened that you where available.
So to be very clear you have to be realistic, you FEEL he is the one. But theres is no FACT. Real love expresses itself with commitment and dedication. Giving without expecting something in return, and RECIVING without asking. If you tell him that he is the love of your life and he answers the same YOU ARE FORCING THE ANSWERS SO ITS NOT A FACT. It will only count if he says it without expecting you to answer. The same works for trust for gifts for dedication for compromise.
So the only way to know if he is really yours is act maturely. In love neither prestige nor the looks nor money are relevant. If he feels something for you her ex would not affect you relationship, it can even came out of this situation stronger. If he leaves you... then my dear he was just being an a**hole looking for something to sooth his current lonelyness, you will be better without him.
Take life slowly as Chai2 said. Nothing is ASAP

Three months is a short time to declare undying love. I can't see a guy doing that at all. It is unfair for you to call him the "love of your life.'

So this is more on your side, than his. He has been in limob all this time - he knew she was coming back.

Only time will tell, But you need to get your emotions under control and expect that he will be carrying out a plan he has had all this time.

Sorry, but that's what's going to happen.

luismtzzz - I probably forgot to say welcome to you here, but I have liked your posts and think you are a neat new member.

Suggestion - when you make a new paragraph, leave some room, it makes it easier for us to read. Some new posters here write walls of text, sometimes bizarre, but often well written, and no one wants to read those over a cup of coffee in the morning.

Meantime, glad you are here.

And I agree with you on your post, entirely.

You might talk to him, but maybe doing nothing is the right thing. It's entirely possible that he won't even be interested in her at this time.

she's back and they'll see how it goes now



(you might want to back off on that love of your life stuff - it's waaaaaaaay too soon to be talking to someone like that - especially when you knew his girlfriend was coming back)

Sometimes I agree with ehBeth so much I want to jump up and down.

Thanks for your advice. I was desperate and hadnt realized I am being very immature. It is just difficult for me starting to know someone, falling in love slowly and then getting noticed about this girl. Now that I am way more focused and relaxed I get to understand that I just need things to flow. I do love him, and it will be hard if he goes for her, but then, as you very kindly have told me, he was not the one. No matter how bad i wanted him to be.
Thanks for your time, lets seewhat happens.
Rosie