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Relationship : Love or Lust

 
 
Reply Wed 18 Dec, 2013 12:24 pm
Met someone. Within a short amount of time felt I fell in love but knew I did not fall. It has been over a year now. I want to let go but I can't no matter what that person does, no matter what I do. I did everything I could think of to make this person move on, find someone else. I did succeed. Lord knows how glad I am for doing so. But I feel I'm still holding on. I want to let go. It should be easy I tell myself. thinking it. But I can't. It's as if I have this person. It's in my head. It's all in my head I keep trying to make myself understand. In reality I don't have this person. This person has found someone. It should be easy for me to let go but it's not. Is it this person was impatient the reason I feel forgiveness? I couldn't give this person what this person wanted in their given time frame. I made sure I wouldn't give what was expected until this person understood me. ((No, this person still does not understand.)) That thing where if you're in love you need to make sure they're in love. They grew impatient with me, the fact I did not immediately give them what they wanted and moved on. How my success was rewarded. For some reason I can't let go. I don't know what to do. The fact I can't let go keeps me from living my life as I want. Stresses me. Brings me down. I was stressed before meeting this person. It has done nothing but drastically get worse. Listening to myself as I think while typing these words I feel foolish. I'm an idiot I tell myself. thinking it.
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Type: Question • Score: 0 • Views: 1,224 • Replies: 26
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anonymously99
 
  -2  
Reply Wed 18 Dec, 2013 02:10 pm
@anonymously99,
I seriously need help with this. Or I would not had posted.
jespah
 
  1  
Reply Wed 18 Dec, 2013 02:18 pm
@anonymously99,
Counseling. Seriously.

You're obsessing over the past.
PUNKEY
 
  0  
Reply Wed 18 Dec, 2013 02:22 pm
@anonymously99,
You must look at this clearly: you had a crush on someone and he could not respond to you - so you are left with these feelings.

You must WORK on giving up these feelings, which have now become an addiction.

Find another love. That is the best way to get over a bad love affair.
anonymously99
 
  -2  
Reply Wed 18 Dec, 2013 02:29 pm
@PUNKEY,
I may just be seriously messed up in the head. I feel I can't find another.
0 Replies
 
anonymously99
 
  -2  
Reply Wed 18 Dec, 2013 02:34 pm
@jespah,
If I were to see a counselor about this mental situation I would only feel crazy before speaking of it. I immediately would shut down before speaking. Then by chance may, most likely would speak but it not be of the mental situation I'm faced with every day.
PUNKEY
 
  0  
Reply Wed 18 Dec, 2013 02:36 pm
There is NOTHING wrong with having trouble getting over a love.

It is a loss and disappointment and sometimes a feeling of rejection.

Do not feel ashamed if you have to talk to someone about this. This will take courage, but you have to decide how much longer you can go on living like this. Life is passing you by and you are "stuck" in this place.
anonymously99
 
  -2  
Reply Wed 18 Dec, 2013 02:46 pm
@PUNKEY,
I think I'm crazy. Because I simply can not let go. This person has to say, tell me in person there was never anything there for me to let go. To me that is real. Otherwise this person should not had fucked/messed with my head. Until he tells me so I feel I will always long for his love.
0 Replies
 
PUNKEY
 
  0  
Reply Wed 18 Dec, 2013 02:48 pm
Why do you need his WORDS? His ACTIONS tell you everything you need to know.

See this CLEARLY!!!
anonymously99
 
  -2  
Reply Wed 18 Dec, 2013 02:56 pm
@PUNKEY,
Actions are nothing compared to words. I can act immature as hell all I want. My mind is what reveals who I am. I hide well. Me exchanging words with you now has me wondering, how deep do you go/how deep are you.
PUNKEY
 
  0  
Reply Wed 18 Dec, 2013 03:03 pm
@anonymously99,
Sounds like you already tried words with him and he didn't understand.

You are just frustrated because you can't get the last word with him.

If he wanted to talk to you, he would have contacted you by now.

Accept that he has revealed himself to you in his actions, and you must accept that's how he is. AND LET IT GO.
anonymously99
 
  -2  
Reply Wed 18 Dec, 2013 03:40 pm
@PUNKEY,
You insist I let go. Why? Are you interested? I'm not serious.
I honestly don't want to speak to this person. So frustration is not likely. I love too much to let frustration conquer me. Stress, depression, else more on the other hand has conquered my entire life. Only having got worse with time.
I don't expect him to ever contact me, to have anything to do with me unless I become good enough. Which arrows point to not ever likely.
Again with the actions.. he can't fool me with him acting immature. This individual has tried many times. If this person doesn't know when he's seriously fucked a person up from his head games then that itself tells me, lets me know he never understood what he was doing. That itself is immature. Being an adult much older in age than I one should know, understand their own actions before doing so. But I know aside from the head games, mind games.. how mature of an individual he is. And I strongly admire that quality in him. Reason I feel as I do for him.
With words as mentioned, I just need to go get diagnosed as a crazy person and hopefully be sentenced to a mental institute.
0 Replies
 
jespah
 
  2  
Reply Wed 18 Dec, 2013 04:36 pm
@anonymously99,
Well then you'll probably never feel any better. But hey, if you don't want to even entertain trying a solution that has helped a lot of people, suit yourself. But you asked for input and suggestions and they were provided. If you dismiss them all out of hand, that's your prerogative, of course, but it makes one wonder why you bothered asking in the first place.
anonymously99
 
  -1  
Reply Wed 18 Dec, 2013 05:19 pm
@jespah,
Please inform me of the solution again. I have a lot on my mind.
jespah
 
  0  
Reply Wed 18 Dec, 2013 05:47 pm
@anonymously99,
I suggested counseling.
anonymously99
 
  -1  
Reply Wed 18 Dec, 2013 06:40 pm
@jespah,
If you understood my mental situation you would understand the difficulties I feel preventing me from doing so. I feel I need help more than anything right now because I honestly don't like feeling the way I feel right now.
I want to be free of feeling.. I just need to get the courage to walk out my front door with the intent of getting help.
Time has a lot to do with it.
anonymously99
 
  -1  
Reply Wed 18 Dec, 2013 09:56 pm
@anonymously99,
The fact that I may cause this person what he caused me mentally helps me let him go. I don't like the idea of causing one what they've caused me. Me mentioning so honestly helps my mental situation to an extent.

I appreciate the help I received on this matter. Kind words from others.
anonymously99
 
  -1  
Reply Fri 20 Dec, 2013 07:20 am
@anonymously99,
An individual should never settle for one who had been obsessed with them. They must seek one who meets their standards.
0 Replies
 
George29
 
  0  
Reply Sat 21 Dec, 2013 02:22 pm
@anonymously99,
Sounds to me like you need a drink to calm your nerves, an experienced friend to discuss your feelings and time to mature. What are you a little child who wants Ice Cream, no, Cookie, no, Ice Cream?
Whoever you are you aren't mature enough for any relationship.
Germlat
 
  0  
Reply Sat 21 Dec, 2013 02:31 pm
@anonymously99,
Can't control everything in life. Sometimes you're ready..thy are not and vice versa . It doesn't come without pain.
 

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