34
   

Things are bad for Wally

 
 
chai2
 
Reply Tue 26 Nov, 2013 09:15 am
He'd been having some increasing health issues I'm not going to go into here.

On Friday he'd been admitted to the hospital. I'd taken him to the doctor, and she said to take him to the ER. He was admitted, and long story short he was going to have an angiogram, and angioplasty yesterday. We found out after admitance that his cardiologist no longer practiced at that hospital, but that was ok, the cardiologist there could do an angioplasty. We were fine with that.

There was a screw up on the scheduling, and he didn't get to go in until I think later than 6pm last night. I wasn't worried because he'd had an angioplasty before.

Then, the cardiologist came in long before I expected him, not a good sign.
He hadn't bothered with the angioplasty because there was so much blockage in so many arteries, including one that had already been stented.

The conversation all happened so fast....too much information all at once. Cardiac bypass....double bypass.....triple bypass.....this just buys him time.....if they can't do bypass some kind of plan to restent/work around stents, I don't know......risk of stroke....cardiologist saying "I've given up on figuring what people will do. They get scared and become model citizens, then in a year go back to their old ways, have a stroke and can sit in a nursing home for years".....It all happened so fast, and was so far away from what I expected, I had no time to even think of questions. I didn't feel anything.

I went back to his room to wait for him to come back, and it started to sink in when different hospital staff started coming in an out before his arrival. 3 different nurses came in to do something, and each of them would stop and give me this really serious look, and say "Have you talking to the doctor yet?" When I said yes, they would just nod and turn away. That's not usual. On other occassions (Wally's had lots of surgeries on different parts. Last one was 3 weeks ago on his shoulder, he's still rehabing from that) if the nurse said "have you talked to the doctor" and I'd say yes, they continue on talking to me about whatever. Not this time.

Right before Wally came back, his nurse for that shift, Dave, talked to me more than "Did you talk to the doctor?" He said Wally would have to be evaluated by an entire team of doctors to even be approved for bypass surgury. "Why?" I asked, "What would keep him from just having it?" He stopped working, met my eyes and said "His heart may be too weak to undergo surgery, his injection fraction is too low, they may consider him too much of a risk." I said "You mean he could die during the surgery?" Dave said "yes".

He went on to tell me how the recovery from bypass is really hard. Since they open your chest his breathing would be really painful. It would involve long rehab.....this is all if they even approve him. I asked Dave what about what the cardiologist said about other interventions. Dave just turned up his hands and said "I don't know what kind of plans the cardiologist has"

Right then Wally comes back. It's obvious he doesn't know any of this, he's joking with the nurses and techs bringing him in. With about a total of 6 people in the room at that moment, I felt freaked out and left for awhile, walking around inside and out. Going out in the cold and letting myself break down in the dark.

Went back in and he was finally alone. When I asked him if he'd talked to the cardiologist he said yes, but obviously hadn't gotten the full import of the matter. No **** just coming out from anesthesia and whatnot. All he knew was "he said he's going to do a bypass" The conversation we had after that was a really hard one.

After a while, when I asked him how he felt, he said "I'm mad. Why didn't he have this conversation with both of us at the same time?" I said, you know, you were squeezed in at the end of the day, it's now 8pm. It's not like he could wait around here all night, but yes, I don't like that I'm telling you all this when I'm not a doctor, and I don't know. All I know if what he said, and what Dave said, and I know Dave can only say so much in his professional capacity. We both said to each other that we wanted to talk to Paolo (that's his regular cardio, Dr V.), maybe he should get transferred to Heart Hospital of Austin where Dr. V. has privileges.
Wally has kept a friendship up with his first wife from 40 years ago. They still love each other. She's an RN. I told Wally if he had the bypass I didn't think I was capable of taking care of him properly, and want her to come down from Illinois and move in with us for awhile. He called her after I left, and she said she'd be willing to do whatever it takes.

(BTW, my rolfer, Sandy who's a nurse just texted me. We'd talked yesterday, and she said call her any time. I told her "not good" and she said she's going to call me in a few minutes)

I spoke to Wally this morning at 7am. He was just ordering breakfast. He's handling this way better than me, at least on the surface. It's after 9am now, I've got to get over there.

I've got to get all my crying and moaning out now, at the house. I knew this day would come, but you're never really prepared for it.
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Type: Discussion • Score: 34 • Views: 6,186 • Replies: 105

 
jespah
 
  3  
Reply Tue 26 Nov, 2013 09:19 am
@chai2,
Oh, boy.

I wish I could say something profound.

I do want you to know that we're here with you.
0 Replies
 
izzythepush
 
  2  
Reply Tue 26 Nov, 2013 09:23 am
@chai2,
I've been there pet, it's not easy, but you will get through it.
0 Replies
 
Izzie
 
  2  
Reply Tue 26 Nov, 2013 09:25 am
@chai2,
I don't know what to say either...

just want you to know I'm thinking of you and Wally and ... well, sending you love and good wishes

talk when you can, Chai


((J))x
0 Replies
 
ossobuco
 
  2  
Reply Tue 26 Nov, 2013 10:38 am
@chai2,
Wow, Chai and Wally. My mind skitters to all the decision making, to call Dr. V or not to, but also what a tremendous thud this is re his status.
Thinking of you both.
0 Replies
 
boomerang
 
  2  
Reply Tue 26 Nov, 2013 10:44 am
@chai2,
I'm so sorry to hear this, chai. I'm so glad that you have real world people to call on while your virtual friends send all their best thoughts to you and Wally.
0 Replies
 
Lordyaswas
 
  2  
Reply Tue 26 Nov, 2013 10:55 am
@chai2,
Not a clue what to say, to be honest with you Chai.

Just thinking of you, and crossing my fingers.
0 Replies
 
sozobe
 
  2  
Reply Tue 26 Nov, 2013 11:33 am
@chai2,
Barely check into A2K anymore but saw this and couldn't not say anything.

I completely understand all of what you wrote -- the rush of information, trying to process it.

Thinking of you and hoping that all of this works out as well as it can.
0 Replies
 
Butrflynet
 
  2  
Reply Tue 26 Nov, 2013 11:56 am
Sorry to hear this,Chai. You are a very strong woman and will do what needs to be done to get you through this. We'll surround you and hold you both in our thoughts and will be here when you need a place of comfort.

0 Replies
 
Walter Hinteler
 
  2  
Reply Tue 26 Nov, 2013 12:01 pm
Hoping like the others that all works out well!
0 Replies
 
edgarblythe
 
  2  
Reply Tue 26 Nov, 2013 12:17 pm
My best wishes for the two of you.
0 Replies
 
vonny
 
  2  
Reply Tue 26 Nov, 2013 12:53 pm
@chai2,
I wish both of you all the luck in the world!
0 Replies
 
Setanta
 
  2  
Reply Tue 26 Nov, 2013 01:02 pm
I would like to add my best wishes, too. I think it can help to have the support of your virtual friends. I hope it helps.
0 Replies
 
JTT
 
  2  
Reply Tue 26 Nov, 2013 01:20 pm
@chai2,
I hope things work out well for both you and Wally, Chai.
0 Replies
 
roger
 
  2  
Reply Tue 26 Nov, 2013 01:27 pm
Best wishes from me too, chai. I can't think of another thing to say, but I'll be hoping for the best as a full time job.
0 Replies
 
Roberta
 
  2  
Reply Tue 26 Nov, 2013 01:39 pm
The only thing I can think of to say is oy.

My hoper will be in high gear for you both.
0 Replies
 
farmerman
 
  2  
Reply Tue 26 Nov, 2013 02:37 pm
@chai2,
Im really sorry to hear this. I hope that hes as comfortable as can be realized and that you two can share some really good time together as he convalesces.
0 Replies
 
PUNKEY
 
  2  
Reply Tue 26 Nov, 2013 02:45 pm
Sorry to hear you are going thru this. I have been there. I found that my husband handled things much better than I did.

I feel we did not have the "final" talk. He just seem to poo-poo everything. Then he was gone.

My heart goes out to you. Hope you have people around you that can be of support.
0 Replies
 
Sturgis
 
  2  
Reply Tue 26 Nov, 2013 03:32 pm
@chai2,
My thoughts and whatever levels of positivity I have are going out to the both of you. It's not a whole lot of help; but, for now it's all I got.
0 Replies
 
Finn dAbuzz
 
  2  
Reply Tue 26 Nov, 2013 05:00 pm
@chai2,
All the best there can be Chai
0 Replies
 
 

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