If personal ads were honest, where would you draw the line?

Oh, whoever answers first should post a new personal, either for men or women, or both...

Haha! That might be why nobody has replied, Cav!

I notice you used my name in your fake ad. You got it all right except for those last couple of sentences! :wink:

Okay, I'll get to work on something!

Hmm...I think I posted this before I knew you Suzy. Now if they knew suzy like I know suzy....oh, never mind.

Hi guys! I'm Suzy! I'm in my early 40's, and it went by really fast! I'm not married, but I raised three boys mostly by myself. If you mess with me, they'll kick your ass! I went to college when my boys went to school, and I was class marshall and spoke at my graduation at age 36, although I'm generally not usually that dorky. I learned to drive and got my lisence at 38, and now I drive around blasting music in the CD player of my Hyundai, which I am still paying for. I like my music loud. I'm a fiend for caffeine, and my coffee is the best. I also smoke, swear and drink, but generally only on Thursdays (the drinking, I mean)! I love both my jobs and I owe lots of money, including hefty student loans and federal taxes! I'm very good at paying my bills but am finding it hard to keep up, but don't ever offer me money because I'll be humiliated and insulted. I don't want your money and I don't want to be taken care of. I have a cute new apartment all to myself and a new bed that hasn't been christened yet! I miss sex and probably have too much past experience to be considered a nice girl, although I really am. I don't want to get married and am not even sure about an actual relationship, so I'm just looking for some occasional male company who will also be a friend. I have long hair and I'm a freak for soaps, socks, and political stuff. I can sometimes seem cold and want to be left alone, and other times just the opposite. I can go without sex for a month but then be all over you for a week. I pretty much hate most cuddling, and I prefer not to kiss with tongues. I am particular about the thread count of my sheets, although I rarely make my bed. At times I can be obnoxiously optimistic and idealistic. I also procrastinate a lot when I need to address a problem, particularly a financial problem, which makes it a bigger problem. My weight goes up and down, so I have finally joined Curves for Women to try to get and keep at a certain weight. I have a burst blood vessel in my face from an injury, but I'm pretty good looking, although my teeth could be better. I shave my legs only when necessary, and have been known to shave my shins halfway up if I'm wearing pants that might ride up my ankles! I do shave for sex though! What I like is a guy who is tall, but it's not a strict requirement. I don't care too much what you look like as long as you're clean, dress decently and are polite. I think goatees are usually goofy, and I don't like long beards. Good eyesight is helpful, as I could use some help plucking these stray chin hairs! You have to like kids and animals and have a good sense of humor, particularly of the absurd. If you're the type who yells about anything, particularly politics, I'm not interested. You have to have a job and be a responsible person. I will rarely cook for you because I can't afford the groceries and I'm not a great cook anyway, but I will bake you cookies and stuff. You should not talk my ear off, you should like people and you have to be smart. A man in uniform is a bonus! Or a suit, or a man who looks good in jeans. No baggy butts!

I don't know if I'd answer it! I would never, ever, consider a personal ad. Too weird.

Edit: repeat post. Sorry! :wink:

Oh, wow! You posted this in April! I hadn't noticed! Add that to my ad; I'm not real observant at times, and I have a really crappy computer that I'm clueless about, so I post 3 times! Also, I will ask you to fix things and replace high lightbulbs for me!

Damn Suzy, we heard you the first time, lol!

Suzy, I enjoyed your faux-ad, full of richness.

I liked it too. All 3 times even ;-)

For some reason, it's not giving me the option to delete. The problem was, the computer was going so slowly that I clicked again, and apparently again!
I will have to PM Craven to help me delete two of them. And then, Montana, you'll look silly instead of me "What does she mean by we heard you the first time?" heehee
So come on, you chickens! Where are your ads?

Hahaha!!!! All you have to do is use the edit button and erase your posts. You can just put double and triple posts in its place and I can do it too, so I don't look like the fool, lol.

I'm thinking on an ad at the moment ;-)

You can't delete after another person posts, unless the other person is you yourself, then you can work your way backwards. If someone else has posted, you can edit it down to near zero, merely leaving the word Edit, or scratch that, or removing post or whatever. I have a lot of experience in this, as I have a long history of double posting, which I am mostly overcoming.

Occasionally someone is snotty about it. Mostly, people understand.

Oh thanks! One down, one to go!

See Suzy, you're not alone :-D

The deed is done! Thanks again!

Well done Suzy. I'll just leave my posts there, so everyone will think I'm losing it ;-)

I coulda sworn I responded to this already! I must be losing it! At this point, Montana, if you deleted yours, this thread would be so confusing! (if it isn't already!)
sorry, Cav!

Knowing Cav, he'll get a kick out of it ;-)

Suzy, that was great. Okay, who's next?