Moving to a new city

I've moved to places I didn't know anyone a few times. I didn't make any particular effort to meet people. I met neighbours, people at work, people at school, people while I was out walking, people at the pool, people at the grocery and corner stores. Some of them became good, lasting friends.

That's how it's done.

It might help you to go to those places in which you will find your personal interests, the expression of your preferences. In such places and situations, you would have a common topic of interest in the awkward time in which we get to know one another. The library, an art gallery--you know best what interests you. Not any easy thing to do, i wish you the best with it.

If someday, I am no longer commited to living in the Baltimore area, I would most likely move to Conneticut. I've spent some time in Branford and New Haven and loved it. I also enjoyed Massachusettes, so that state is a possiblity too.

I would NEVER move anywhere in the Southeast part of the country. I don't much like southern culture. I've never found southern hospitality to be all that hospitable. The midwest seems too hokey for my taste and, since I've never been to the West Coast, it's too unknown and foreign to me to ever consider starting a new life alone there.

You won't believe this but I travel in my work and I always look up the nearest bridge club. Duplicate bridge is great for meeting new people because the East-West pairs have to move through all the tables. I'm 50 and I've met some lovely women and made a lot of friends. Hint: Bridge players are damn smart.

I've lived in Severna Park and West Palm Beach and wouldn't go back to the Baltimore area for anything. To each his/her own.

I've lived in Maryland my whole life and I'm not crazy about it. The crime rate is high, the politicians are for the most part corrupt, and the majority of the population is dumber than a box of rocks.

There's something about New England that I like. I think it's beautiful up there and the people I met were all teriffic.

I agree, there's a simpleness to life in a lot of places that is calming. Outside of the cities that is.

It is really hard question specially if you are new one in a town or city that no one know you ......
how could i have a friends i will just wait till they apear soon or later because friends are there but we don't know them till the chance come....
thats what i think .....
thanks

I love the Monterey/Carmel/Big Sur area and that's where I would be moving to if I can figure out a way to afford it.

Nice post hail. I agree.

SAN DEIGO, CALIFORNIA!

Re: Moving to a new city


Look for gathering places that relate to your interests, go to a few and ask questions. I've found that if you express to people that you are new to the area and are just interested in finding things most are very helpful.

Panzade mentioned Bridge Clubs and that isn't entirely silly. If you play Bridge you have something in common with others there. If you express interest some of them are likely to fill you in on the local scene and introduce you to other people they know.

I've always looking for sporting clubs and/or the local sporting goods store (not the big chain stores, the little place out on the lake that sells bait right next to the 3 day old hotdogs and coffee that doubles as motor oil. ). I'm guaranteed to meet up with a few people that have like interests every time I go.

Try a coffee shop!

Coffee, Tea or ME?

LOL @ Doglover

Re: Moving to a new city


When I went to Wilmington, DE to start Law School, I knew absolutely no one and had never been there except to look at the school and to plunk down $$ on a summer sublet. Here's what I did:
(1) I made friends at my summer job. I was not friends with them for longer than the summer, but it helped in terms of making me feel less lonely. You can sit and read a book during lunch or you can be with people. I chose being with people.
(2) I made friends at school - one of whom came to my wedding, which was 6 years after we'd graduated. School is a somewhat obvious place to meet people, and it need not be terribly formal education. Pottery classes, adult education, spinning classes at the Y or the like will all bring you in contact with people with interests that are similar to yours. Much of what I'm suggesting isn't expensive, either.
(3) I met people by working during my first summer at the local food co-op. At the time I was a fairly strict vegetarian so that brought me into contact with other vegetarians and it was good, physical labor and was something to pass the time.
(4) During my second summer in Delaware, I worked for a political campaign and met a lot of different people. It was for Senator so one of the ways I helped was by traveling around the state and setting up various party events. I also went to things like the 4:30 AM shift change at the local auto plant and waited for workers to come out and handed them bumper stickers. You don't really meet the auto workers but you do get to know the people who hand out the stickers with you. And I got to know the people I used to set up the parties with (yes, I've put up bunting).
(5) I networked through my sorority and through my college. My sorority has an Alumnae club in the area, so I went to some meetings. My college has some alums living in the area so I tried to get into touch with some of them.

Were any of these people lasting friends? Except for the woman who came to my wedding, I'd have to say no, but that's okay. A lot of our friend relationships are situational ones, where we keep in touch because it's convenient or because we are assured of being thrown into the same places a lot. True, very long-lasting friends are incredibly hard to find, but that's for a good reason - they're meant to be special. Most people don't have more than a handful of those types of friends in their entire lives.

Thanks everyone. If you've been on the other thread I started, you know I'm trying to decide if moving 3,000 miles away will take away the pain of my broken heart.

it isn't fair that it doesn't kill you. That your heart breaks and you still are breathing. When the heart breaks it should stop beating

Hell no it shouldn't stop beating! Not while having the power to heal itself.