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Emotional connection possible after being physical?

 
 
Reply Tue 23 Jul, 2013 08:37 am
I started dating this guy over a month ago, we took things really fast to the physical level and he still acted like he liked me and spent time with me even without the physicality involved. Even after we would be intimate he would remain next and close to me and didn't back away. He then spent the weekend at my house and all of a sudden backed off. I realized that he probably got scared and so I gave him about a week with no real contact and then i decided to casually text him and in that told him that I feel pushed away and I feel we took things too fast and I want to start over, he agreed and said he didn't want me to be hurt. I told him I am not the kind of woman to run away from hard situations considering we are both extremely busy, him working 12 hour shifts and going to school and have to find time. After that I did not expect to hear from him again, he texted me the next day asking how i was and we had such an amazing and fun conversation and he said he missed my cat and we were being silly and then he asked if he could see me that Saturday. We were texting Friday afternoon and he asked me if he could come pick me up later that day, go to a movie and stay at his place so I could already be there for the whole day Saturday (he has to drive 1.5 hours each way). We ended up spending the weekend together and it was absolutely amazing, we talked, laughed and it was nice, no pressure. Basically, is this a good sign that he initiated contact and asked to go on a date after I expressed all my feelings? how do I build an emotional connection considering we were already physical?
 
BillRM
 
  0  
Reply Tue 23 Jul, 2013 09:16 am
Only time will tell if this relationship have any legs or not however that is true of all relationships.

Far too many unknowns to guess at things like him calling you is a good sign or a bad sign.

I suggest if you enjoying the relationship and are careful not to risk bringing a new life into the equation to enjoyed yourself an let time tell the tale.
0 Replies
 
engineer
 
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Reply Tue 23 Jul, 2013 10:21 am
@justme88,
You're over thinking this. Spending the weekend together talking and laughing with no pressure is how you start to establish an emotional connection. You're on the right track.
BillRM
 
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Reply Tue 23 Jul, 2013 10:45 am
@engineer,
Quote:
You're over thinking this


I ran into this with my now wife when the relationship was new in that she was looking for secret or hidden meanings in some of my email.

Years later when I found this out I told her men for the most part, at least this man, are too simple to bury such meanings between the lines in their messages.
justme88
 
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Reply Tue 23 Jul, 2013 11:54 am
@BillRM,
so what exactly do you mean? i wasn't reading into his messages i just thought it was nice that he wanted to spend extra time with me. Do you think that me being open but not pushy about my feelings made him see me in a new light? The thing is he also got out of a 4 year relationship to a woman he was engaged to 6 months ago so do you think i should give him his own space while being supportive? he said he's over it.
jennibob
 
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Reply Tue 23 Jul, 2013 08:12 pm
@justme88,
I think you handled it well and you are on a good track. Men often back away a bit when they feel a bit pressured or aren't quite ready - and by being open, he realised he didn't need to worry and back away. If he didnt have some feelings, he wouldnt have come back to you.
I wouldn't worry too much about his previous relationship - the right person can make you forget all about an ex and all people get over things at different rates. 6 months is certainly long enough for some people.
Personally, I would continue on the path you are, and maybe a few months down the line, have 'the conversation' to make things official, if you havent got to the point already.
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BillRM
 
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Reply Tue 23 Jul, 2013 08:34 pm
@justme88,
I think you are taking this relationship far far to serous far too soon and you should just relax and get to know the man better and see what will or will not developed over time.

Not be looking at him as a possible life mate at this point in time.
0 Replies
 
carlosc2dbz
 
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Reply Tue 30 Jul, 2013 08:51 pm
@justme88,
You can do both independent of each other. And you can also combine them to build on each other. Just do what feels right, and if its meant to be, it will be.
0 Replies
 
carlosc2dbz
 
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Reply Tue 30 Jul, 2013 08:51 pm
@justme88,
You can do both independent of each other. And you can also combine them to build on each other. Just do what feels right, and if its meant to be, it will be.
0 Replies
 
 

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